Waking up early in the morning, to drive my Mom to work. Have to take Noah to the doctors and hopefully get called into work, either before or after the doctors. I really need the money. I need to be able to get myself back to Rhode Island on Sunday next week. Need tips to do that.

It was great for a while. Clearly, I made the mistake of buying the wrong rice for dinner tonight. My mom is flipping a shit. My apologies for ending the world. Jesus Christ. Hopefully I am going to be able to work tomorrow, so I can get the hell away from my mother, just for a little while. I just need to stop with everything. I want to see my friends from school. I want to see Eddy and Patrick and Jess. I miss them.

If you think I am annoying, Bella, the options are very clear. Deal with it or don't read my journal dear (: Looked at the car yesterday, did a test drive, it was awesome. I fell in love with it. Today is Benny's birthday party, he is getting so big! Heading to his party in a bit, pretty excited that I get to see my whole family. After I am going to Boston with Taylor. It'll be good to get away for a while. Spending all week working at Dunks, and then black Friday, I'll be at Bath and Body Works. That will be something.

I am joining next fall (: PT test= sit ups, push ups and a 2 mile run. I have already passed everything except for the sit ups. I have no idea why but my core it shot. Literally I can do 20 sit ups on my own. So I just need to work on that, and definitely get my two mile time down some more. I am just passing. If I cut 1 more minute I will get like 10 extra points. Haven't heard from Patrick all day. I figure if he doesn't talk to me today, he probably will tomorrow when we are on break. I am contemplating skipping writing tomorrow just so that I can be with him for a couple hours. So I kinda wanna see if he will definitely hang out with me tomorrow, instead of just skipping for nothing.. Good God, I like him.

I have made a life changing decision. I am contracting to the United States Army in the spring. I've been working on getting into shape so that I can do this, all year. I've made some progress, and I am hoping that it will keep getting better. I want this.

It is debatable that this has been one of the best nights at school so far. I had the best sex that I have ever had in my life. It was amazing. We went right into it. He was over earlier this afternoon too, not for sex though. We went right into it and after a good 50 minutes of amazing sex, we cuddled and watched Harry Potter. Then he wanted to do it again. We were just about to and then Jess texted me asking if she could come up and get some stuff. So we didn't end up doing anything else. He asked me to hang out with him tomorrow too, and I would love to. I would totally skip URI 101 to stay with him for a couple of hours. I have an hour and a half break when he does, so I am hoping that he will still hang out. I really hope so. Jess will be at class too, which will be perfect. I'll have to text him to find out (:

Jess (my roommate) took my lab directions and rubric to do hers last week. On Thursday she told me that she put it back in my folder, but look at that, it's not there! Thanks a bunch. Getting a 0 for the lab. And thanks a fucking bunch for not answering my texts when I ask you where it is. Fucking bitch.

Patrick texted me this afternoon, like I knew he would. He apologized for last night and basically told me everything that went on this week. I am still mad but even still. I have feelings for this man. I can't just let him go.

I will hold on hope. And I will let you choke (: Laundry, homework and gym today.

Tonight sucked, but tomorrow will be better. One more night alone until Jess comes back. Homework and laundry tomorrow. Maybe I'll hear from Patrick, but I doubt it of course. It's okay, I'll carry on like I always do, whether he is with me or not. Sleep bring relief in the hope of a new day.