Even If It Kills Me

The whole album is a story to me.

*Fell In Love Without You..he fell in love with a close friend, but was sure she didn't feel the same.

*This Is For Real..he knew he needed her. Not necessarily in a love manner - but needed her help to stay on track, wanted her to stay in his life because she somehow made everything easier.

*It Had To Be You..he came around to telling her how he felt, she felt the same and he felt stupid for not telling her sooner. They got together.

*Last Night..time passed, things went wrong, the relationship got rocky but still exists.

*Calling All Cops..he did something stupid that night, and he's worried he's going to lose her.

*Can't Finish What You Started..they talked, he realized some things, and had a talk with himself. Kind of a realization that he messed up, but isn't sure he wants to try to get better.

*The Conversation..still not doing good, he's thinking about the night they met & decides he needs to talk to her. It's the conversation that happened that night. She ends it, because she feels she's lost herself in his mess.

*Broken Heart..he's hurt, but wants to put the pieces of his life back together and move on. He still has so much to say to her, but doesn't know how to say it, and decides he's better off not saying anything. He fakes his happiness and pretends to move on, but the pressures build up and he basically says screw it, I'm not gonna try anymore.

*Hello Helicopter..I'm not sure about this one. I think it's a helping hand, or what he sees as one. Maybe drugs or alcohol.

*Where I Belong..He's really confused about where he's going and what he's doing, who he is. Every day is a bad one, he thinks he deserves this and it's "where he belongs".

*Point Of Extinction..He's lost, wandering, and hoping that she'll still be around when he gets the pieces of his life back together. He's kind of sick of moping and wants to try to get it together.

*Antonia..Not sure about this one. Not sure about any of them really, but, this is just MY interpritation on the album..

And of course, Even If It Kills Me..

He's decided that he really is fed up with being depressed about losing her, and that moping isn't going to get him anywhere. He's got a lot on his mind, and a lot he needs to get set straight, but "for the first time in a long time [he] can say that [he] wants to try to get better and overcome each moment in [his] own way". He really, really, really wants to get himself straight on his own. He wants to stop thinking about what happened and be okay.

I think this song is pretty much explains itself, and in my opinion it's one of the best Motion City songs...ever. The words say a lot, and it's definitely one I can relate to in some way, and I'm sure a lot of other people can, too.

Sorry, I kind of went a little overboard and ended up explaining my take on the entire album instead of just the song.

This is the perfect song to end the album with. The meanings of the song is obvious. But the last couple of lines are amazing:

"i so want to get back on track and I'll do whatever it takes... Even if it kills me."

After listening to the album for the first time, I found myself singing these to myself. Damn MCS is good.

I don't see how this song doesn't describe trying to overcome depression. I think it can apply to specific situations, but I don't think the song is talking about an episodic depresssion. This is a constant strain that's been on him for years. I've been there every step, and, sadly, I can say that I identify with every line.

When you're depressed, and I mean clinically depressed -- not for some legitimate reason -- but depressed beyond help, you can't do anything. I'm eighteen years old, and my room is filled with boxes containing discarded memories and forgotten plans. No matter how hard I try, I can never seem to do everything I'd like; in fact, it feels like I can't even start. I told my friend Ethan I'd burn him some CDs half a year ago. The blank stack has been sitting by my computer since that day.

The part about trying to "lose my mind" is kind of strange, but if he's thinking like I did, then he's wishing he could go insane so he wouldn't have to experience the world. Winter, the lack of sun, makes everything worse. The snow and cold don't help either, but the sun helps bring a little life back into us depressed folks -- it's been studied. And of course, the knuckle is speaking to the concrete because I was so frustrated with life I punched it. Which doesn't help, by the way.

Whenever I try to fix something, some depressing idea that I have about life, whenever I try to amend it, it gets worse. Thinking about problems doesn't solve them -- it just brings out the futility. I can never fix this; I can never be happy. I think that's what the bridge means.

The chorus hits me hard. I'm emotionally exhausted. So much so that I can't fall asleep, and so much so that I don't want to dream, because they hurt almost as much as waking life. I can't do anything about this world I live in or this life I have, but I'm trying to open my eyes to the beauty of it. "And the sad truth of the matter is I'll never get over it, / But I'm gonna try" -- I normally break down by this point. I just want to get better. I just want to fix my life. I just want to feel again.

Last year I decided that I needed help. I didn't want pills to fuck up my brain or make me off myself -- someone I love tried that once because of depression meds. But I want to get better. I need to get better. I'll do whatever it takes.

Even if it kills me....

This song gave me chills the first time I heard it. I just love them so much.

you know you got a good album under wraps if people alraedy know all the words before the release date..

perfect album, perfect song. best song on the album probably.

great finisher

even if it kills me

love!

The perfect song to finish this album.

this could be one of the best motion city soundtrack songs ever made.

oops mass commenting by me.. well anyway the song is about justin overcoming his drinking and drug problem.. he had a breakup from his 2.5 year girlfriend while recording the album.. and he got fucked for couple of weeks (this is from an interview in drummedia).

he has now however been sober for 100 days. and counting. explains this:

"For the first time in a long time I can say that I want to try I feel helpless for the most part, but I'm learning to open my eyes And the sad truth of the matter is I'll never get over it, But I'm gonna try To get better and overcome each moment In my own way...

I so want to get back on track And I'll do whatever it takes Even if it kills me..."

this is the ultimate heartbreak song.

you cant eat or sleep and can barely function. but you dont want to be that emotional mess, so you try and try to move on but everyone makes mistakes on how they treat a broken heart. but finally at the end you want to move on not just try- but actually do it at all costs even if it kills you.

amazing. really truly.