What Would a Wookie Do?

Man, these lyrics are ALL messed up. The thing is, Neil Fallon, being the incredible poet that he is, writes with a TON of double entendres and obscure references to things in literature, popular culture, etc. and basically, if you don't know what those references are, you will ALWAYS misinterpret the lyrics. I have yet to find a correct version of the lyrics to this song on the internet. Now, I don't pretend to know them all myself, but I do know quite a bit of the correct ones for this song, and with that said, I'll try to give my best transcription of them. I'll also try to comment to back up what I think he's saying or what I know he's saying.... here goes nothing.

Two oaken doors Open to floors Imported marble Victorian chores

Van Gogh-betweens (mixing Van Gogh and the word go-betweens) Bucolic scenes (bucolic means pastoral, or dealing with the countryside, which much of Van Gogh's art definitely was) Machiavellian and all the lesser-named schemes

Greyhounds and rabbits go round and round but everybody scatters when the Hindenberg goes down

Robber Baronesses Carpet Baggers-ese But honestly speakin' now we all got the same plisses ( - mispronunciation of the french word. It's a way to make pleated fabrics, sort of ties into the carpet bagger reference above)

I'm afraid the party's cancelled - What? The servants never showed - Damn! On the wall was penciled A most foreboding note

Forest getting ready Man begat too much All the world will suffer The Wookie's wicked clutch

The theocrats With cricket bats Hezbollotta love to give (Hezbollah and a lot of love mixed into one word... the irony is that Hezbollah is regarded as a terrorist organization, not one known for "love", and they advocate a theocratic state, based on Islam. Ties into the previous lines) you never take it back

A graver danger (You bounce and rape her? bouncing raver? not really sure on this one) Medulla oblongata go (oblongata go... gotta go... another mixed metaphor and might be the key to the previous line but I don't get the connection yet. ) I'll see you all later

Ole Festus draggin' one leg behind (okay, nobody is gonna know this, but Festus was the name of a character on Gunsmoke, who limped.) And when the trap is sprung The warrior loses his mind

Assassins trippin' High on hashish But honestly speaking now, We all need the same relief

One day or another, kid Our war will be gone One day or another, kid All death will be done One day or another, kid Our war will be gone One day

General Borders You have your orders Invisible Freemasonry Incoming mortars

The flyers landing And are demanding Keep on firing Until the last man standing

Stockcars in habits Go round and round But everybody scatters When the stock market goes down

Robber Baronesses Carpet Baggers-ese But honestly speakin' now We all got the same disease

I'm afraid the hunt's been cancelled The game never showed (game, as in what people hunt) On the trick was penciled A most foreboding note

Forest gettin' ready Man begat too much All the world will suffer The Wookie's wicked clutch

Agree re: sorting.

I always thought it was "Victorian cross", aka the place he's describing has vaguely old-school pre-Nazi fascist symbolism....but on closer listening, I agree it has to be drawers or chores. Chores sounds closer to it, but makes less sense than drawers....maybe there's some rare word like "choars" that they're intending.

Agree that it has to be Hephaestus and not "Ole Festus".

Also, sounds like and has to be "bouncing raver".

The first verse sounds like it is describing typical rich people, and the choruses give a similar effect Hunting, greyhounds, rabbits, expensive things in their house,cricket, they are finished if the stock market has trouble and it is a wookie that will take everything.

I'm fairly certain its "I'm afraid the Party's Canceled" makes much more sense with the servants mentioned right after.

Hmmm... I am probably wrong, but my interpretation is that this is bashing that which we all hate and yet want to be... rich people

Greyhounds and rabbits Go round and round But everybody scatters when the Hindenburg goes down!

Robber-Baroness-es Carpetbaggers-ese But honestly speaking, now We all got the same disease

General Border is a character in the children's book "Drummer Hoff;" which, by the way, is fuckin trippy. I'm not really sure how that ties to the overall meaning of the song, though.

I think that this song is lamenting the way those in power exploit those beneath them within the contexts of religion and war. Come to think of it, that may be where the Drummer Hoff reference fits in (General Border gave the order and Drummer Hoff fired it off). The references to carpetbaggers, robber barons, and Hezbollah seem to support this.

The above lyrics are incorrect; it should be:

The Theocrats with cricket bats Hezbollot of love to give ya never take it back

I think in general, the lyrics are talking about how we humans are involved in all this unnecessary personal struggle and drama, chasing each other around like greyhounds and rabbits, while ignoring what we're doing to the rest of the world.

So while we keep hoping our war will be over and death will be done someday - that day approaches in another grimmer form.

And so eventually, while we're messing about with all this nonsense, from the forests (aka wild nature) will come our rectification. This is in the form of the implacable righteous wookie.