This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
hold yourself I'm done
my arms are tired
saw you walking backwards
towards the fire
i'm in love with the red sky
i'm in love with the tragedy
we betray what we can't deny
she believes she needs me
caught a flash
of absolute perfection
shattered light
and dark
in all directions
traffic floats like a ballet
far below in the distance
just as sad as the words we'd say
it's all gone in an instant
it's just so easy, it's hard
it's just so easy, it's hard
hold me closer
I can't feel you
You'll have to trust me
I can't steal you
ash trays lie
like hearts for you to burn in
smoke curls from your mouth
before you turn in
We're in love with a black gun
I see loss in the mundane
in the hours, the minutes run,
they're not so subtle
but they have their way
it's just so easy
it's hard
it's just so easy
it's hard
hold me close,
I can't feel you
you'll have to trust me
I can't steal you
my arms are tired
saw you walking backwards
towards the fire
i'm in love with the red sky
i'm in love with the tragedy
we betray what we can't deny
she believes she needs me
caught a flash
of absolute perfection
shattered light
and dark
in all directions
traffic floats like a ballet
far below in the distance
just as sad as the words we'd say
it's all gone in an instant
it's just so easy, it's hard
it's just so easy, it's hard
hold me closer
I can't feel you
You'll have to trust me
I can't steal you
ash trays lie
like hearts for you to burn in
smoke curls from your mouth
before you turn in
We're in love with a black gun
I see loss in the mundane
in the hours, the minutes run,
they're not so subtle
but they have their way
it's just so easy
it's hard
it's just so easy
it's hard
hold me close,
I can't feel you
you'll have to trust me
I can't steal you
Lyrics submitted by Oelie, edited by asmith1912
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I'm not sure what this song really means but my interpretation of it reflects something I am going through. I really cared about someone whom I knew was in love with me, but I wasn't in love with. It hurt him to be around me and know that I didn't feel the same.
So, the lyrics "Hold me close, I can't feel you, You'll have to trust me, I can't steal you" really hit a chord with me... it seems that all he wants is to hold onto someone, to be close to them but also wants them to know (trust) that he realizes he "can't steal" them. Kind of like not being able to steal their heart or make them fall in love.
in any case, it is a beautiful song!
I'm like crying so hard over this right now. I saw him and Brian Fallon do this one night in Terminal 5 and wasn't into it because I was just there for Gaslight, but now this one means a lot to me cause I'm going through the same sort of thing Matthew seems to sing about.
I love a girl so much. Frankly, she loves me too, but she's just not ready for a relationship. But now my persistence has pushed her away a little further, and I don't know what to do. I feel sick to my stomach. Physically ill over her. And I can't steal her. It's hard to listen to the sad Gaslight songs now, because we've shared so much over The Gaslight Anthem, and now it just hurts to listen to them. I know she'll come around one day. I know it. We're best friends and I have nobody else. It's just so hard in this situation specifically. I'm just glad there are songs like this to relate to. "I know there's someone out there feeling just like I feel" Brian Fallon's lyrics go.
So as far as I can tell the song is roughly about a guy who has given up trying to figure out a way to get the girl back after doing something wrong (cheating maybe?) and is saying "ya know what? If you wanna be with me, you can but I am done trying."
Especially the lines: "Hold yourself, I'm done. My arms are tired" "We betray what we can't deny, cuz I believe she needs me" "just as sad as the words we'd say...it's all gone in an instant"
All of this points to a guy who screwed up but in his mind it wasn't enough to warrant all his begging for her to come back and now he is just done with it.
As a separate point, I am not sure that this isn't an unreliable narrator since some of the lyrics seem to say that he is gonna keep chasing her.
e.g. "it's just so easy it's hard
hold me close, I can't feel you you'll have to trust me I can't steal you"
It's just so easy is what he says to himself to leave her. But it's not. Especially the way that it was sang when he did it with Brian, one was singing the first part but both sang the "it's hard"
In any event, just what I am seeing in it (and full disclosure, this is similar to something that happened to me).