I wonder if there are deer out there with Genophobia. (Fear of sex) Are there deer with avoidant personality? Does this deer hide in the shrubbery when the other deer want to go grazing? Do other deer worry that this particular deer will never find a mate? ===== Same thing goes for anorexia/obesity, even. You never see a fat deer. Are there deer who seem to eat much more than the others? Or is there that one deer who won't eat any berries, and have all other deer over exagerate, and try to make him eat some berries.

I'm unintentionally a serial lady killer. For some reason, I draw them in (unknowingly), then I realise it, and then I kill them. Dead. God, my backyard is running out of ground for bodies. I'll have to buy more land. ==== Really, though. I'm one of those people who would rather be alone. But I think I just booked every Monday and Wednesday from 12-1:3o. The only 'friend' I made at school has to wait for the next class during that time, and I go home then, so I offered to wait with her today. Well, I assume it's going to be an everyday thing now. I like going home and being alone. I love it, really. Though it was nice to be out today. She took me to some restaurant that I've never heard of. =========================== I am sick of killing ladies, though.

And when she walks across the crowded room The voices turn to silence They can see her devil eyes And they can hear her breath cry out Through the holes in her cheeks Across the lipstick on her teeth She's aching and she's shaking She is breaking Like the bottle by her feet They're all staring at her, now As she screams up at the clouds She's freaking out and sinking down I'm thinking Don't bullets make that sound And when she lays down in the crowded room The voices turn to silence They can see her devil eyes But they can't hear her breath cry out So she lays there in the middle Between the blues, between the whites The ruby on her necklace shines without a light There's crying in the backyard And the moon is hidden from the sky

I was walking down the alley Saw a man, his name was Sally Walked him home to the box beneath my feet I gave him a dollars worth of cans All I could fit in my two hands Said Goodbye and I was walking down the street Then Sally raised his voice Said I’m here by choice Left the girl I loved, the family I adored They say that I’m not living But the world just keeps on giving And I’m happier than when I was before ‘Cause I’ve got angels watching over me And any choice of scenery And those people who don’t even know my name They’ve used so many cheats that they’ve forgotten how to play the game I started walking west and saw a man With a suitcase in his hand He walked right passed the alley with a cringe I said I know how you live And I know you’ve got some to give He said I’m not funding that guy’s binge You put a dollar in his sack He’ll buy some whiskey, but some crack He’ll take my hand and throw it down the drain I’ve got children’s mouths to feed Better than Chef Boyarde There you go, I’m late for the next train Hey, I’ve got angels watching over me I’d help him if it were free But he won’t even remember my name He’s left it on pause so long that he’s forgotten how to play the game I don’t know if the game is on ‘Cause either way, the game is wrong But I walked back and sat down next to Sally He welcomed me into his life Offered me to be his wife I’m never going back into that alley

There was something deep inside You couldn’t see I tried to hide But memories kept crawling back into my eyes I told you all about the day You flinched from me You looked away Yes, there are reasons for the things I never say She was nineteen Feeling hungry all the time And when she looked at me There wasn’t more than fever in her eyes She was nineteen She didn’t have a care There was a sickness in the air I lost my self on that soft summer night I tried to tell you in the park But you were bright My mind’s too dark But it grew quiet behind the dashboard in my car I told you all about that night You took my hand I held it tight Twelve o’clock and the stars were realigning in the sky She was eighteen She never looked the same And when she looked at me I could see the ocean in her eyes She was eighteen The wind blowing in her hair And Bryan Adams in the air I lost myself on that soft summer night

Is it weird that I kind of want to have this love affair... only to end up having the girl die. A young death. Suicide, probably? So then I'd be put in this depression, having this immortal love for a girl I never got to fully know, but fell so in love with? It's very insert certain book title here. But I want my life to be like a book. Whether it be a monocide of my girlfriend, or I turn into a grim reaper like Dead Like Me, or just that I have to go on some adventure in search of someone/something missing. ================================ I thought that being in college would cause me to find Someone who would give me some kind of new story, but I have met no one, and don't really plan on meeting anyone. ============ BUT... knock on wood... my cousin filled out an application with me, and she is going to turn it in for me tomorrow. So, this will be my Second application for a job. Hopefully I get this one. My cousin keeps telling me things making it seem like I'd be welcomed.. "She'll like you. The boss loves kids, she has her own" "You're so quiet. They'll like that" Plus, she works there, so I have an in. But idk. Like I said, knock on wood. I really need a job though. I've run out of money. Au Revoir.

So face it You're wasted And everyone here knows You don't think You got shit faced Now go home to your daughter and scream We'll armageddon's going down Tomorrow you'll leave town 'Cause tonight, you've let the beast free Crashing in's the high tide You're little girl's run off to hide 'Cause tonight, you're taking the lead Tonight, you're stumbling free There's glass shards Through the back yard Broken bottles and hearts And you still don't think You had too much to drink The experts will believe what they want to believe But trust me when I say This is a mistake You're gonna wish you never made There's a price you've gotta pay We'll armageddon's going down Tomorrow you'll leave town 'Cause tonight, you've let the beast free Crashing in's the high tide You're little girl's run off to hide 'Cause tonight, you're taking the lead Tonight, you're stumbling free Tonight, keep your hands off me

Well, I love you more than ice-cream if it’s made out of sand I love you more than all the pigs I can fit into my hand I love you more than Hitler loved people who chewed loud And I love you more than all the people who knew I’d say chewed loud You’ve got a heart that gives so much blood to all your veins Your love’s so strong it almost makes me drive into a train If you were drowning in a river, well, frankly I can’t swim I’ll die if the water’s deep enough. 20ft? I’ll dive right in I love you so much, darling It’s starting to make me twitch But I know you talk about me Because you’re such a snitch And loving you like I did Really was quite a stunt It was so hard to be with you Because you were such a runt And I am so tall Short people and tall people look weird side by side I love you more than 80’s hair: Mohawks and jheri curls I love you more than the right wing loves girls loving girls I love you more than Three Days Grace loves everything about you And I love you more than all the water flooding all over the moon I bet you thought that I could never love you oh so grand It’s better than the love between U.S. and Afghanistan You are surprised that I am still here, you thought that I’d leave Well, I could never do that while you’ve got me tied to this tree So darling Oh darling You know I love you so And I know you love me And they say If you love something You’re meant to let it go So if you love me Would you please let me go And if I come back How much I love you, you’ll know Hey, Darling Please, please, please Just let me go

So it’s always summer in California And being rich as great You’re boyfriends a dick But that’s ok You love him too much to walk away I get it Again and again and again I get it For the eighth, ninth, tenth time today So won’t you turn the station Before these 4 songs start replaying Yeah, I love music coming through in stereo But fuck the radio So love me, love me Overplay me It doesn’t matter if you change me I’m everywhere Yeah, I love music I really do I’d say I love it more than you And that’s why I don’t listen to this station ‘Cause it’s just these 4 songs replaying Yeah, I love music coming through in stereo But fuck the radio Fuck the radio

I haven't done one in a while... so I felt I needed to. ======= When September comes around And you're still off this ground I can hardly remember how you'd laugh without a sound You're eyes were either green or blue And sometimes I don't dream of you But I still see your face each night Glaring from the lighting of the moon And I can hear you're faintest sigh I didn't think we'd have to say good-bye So I walk into the gray skies And I'm looking into my own eyes There's a shadow walking closer than I ever thought could be My jeans have blackened with your swampy turf And I wonder why I'm on this earth You're only two yards away, but you've never been further away from me Well the weather's come to pass No, the clouds, they never last But it'll come back soon enough, the eye goes much too fast The sound of you when I'm alone Never fails to shake these bones I don't need to see you here To know that you have never left this home And I can hear you're faintest sigh I didn't think we'd have to say good-bye So I lie down and close my eyes And now I can see the sky All the world is golden, a sunset glowing off the lake But my world's turned a bitter gray 'Cause everything's been pulled away I'll chase this dream, 'cause really, You've got nothing left to take And I can hear you're faintest sigh I didn't think we'd have to say good-bye