Jeez-us...shes beginning to be a pain in my ass! dont get me wrong, i love her, shes my friend...but if i hear ONE more thing about Derrick...im going to scream.

it goes by fast...my baby is going to be an adult soon...its crazy...and i can totally understand whyy hes alittle unsure of things about the future...its just one of those things that you get thrown into and (in most cases.) come out okay...hes a great guy and hes strong...hell do fine...i know he will :) I was planning on joining the peace core...but i want to start my life with him...so maybe i wont....not saying i never will...but maybe ill just put it on hold for awhile cuz 2years without him is a along time, and i dont want him to have to sacrifice and come with me...so i think im not going to go now... its crazy what you'll do for love. i wonder what my mom is up too...IDK..shes been on ym mind lately...ick.

with no drugs! lol SO i talked to my baby for like 6 hours...i felt like i was in him...and he was in me...everything just felt so ...right. We talked about the future...i wasnt scared about it at all...in fact i cant fuckin wait to get there...to wake up next to him everyday...kiss him before i go to work...and hold him when i get home....work on music whenever we get a kool idea...be intament whenever we want...and shut the world out when we just want eachother...OMG that would be like...my heaven... We also talked about arguements and such...to know that we're on the same page and that we would never let it get that far means alot...it just shows how much we love eachother. i love my baby so much...he is everything to me and without him id be lost

called into the office? this be GAY!!!!

well now...interesting entry you have there Oz... lol well let me just start off will the usual...youre crazy. lol but ...wow....*blush* also...baby...touching you...hearing your deep and surrealistic voice...sends chills thru my body...when you hold me from behind and you have your hands on my hips...O my god...im going crazy in my mind. Staring into your fiery brown eyes gets me lost in this feeling....and its so hard to look away...i crave you baby...everything about you damn...i have to stop before i go crazy... fuck.

those bastards at my skool blocked punkvoter! KILL!

you know how when you watch old people you can kinda see a trace of what they used to be...before they got all fragile and forgotten? no one ever wants to end up there...but everyone does...with age you obtain knowledge and wisdoms beyond younger capacities...but you also begin to loose what you had worked to hard to achieve. which brings me to a realization...am i afraid of growing old? shit.

i read your entries...and i would love to listen to you if you want to elaborate more on it. People always have a very big impact on our lives...and sometimes open our eyes to things we never knew were in us. Also...in turn, you have had a very big impact on my thoughts and opinions aswell. Its funny to think about how 3years can have so many changes and so many turning points... and to think....youll have alot more in your life aswell...people run in and out of your life all the time...but its best to never forget what you observed. damn....thats alot to think about...people...everyone is so...odd hard to explain...

"black coat, white shoes, black hat, cadillac...the boys a timebomb"-Rancid good song. its funny...i got another moral from Alice In Wonderland...(ive been watching it alot latly...i want to know why a raven is like a writing desk...damn it lol) theres alot of morals in that story..here are a few "Say what you mean and mean what you say" "Rationality is key to a world of nonsence" "Its not what you look for, its what you see" i just found the last one...its sooooo fuckin true... everyone just pull the drug references out of that boook/movie...but theres so much more. you just have to see between the lines.. goodtimes. damn...i was thinking about the past...the differences between my freshman year and now...last year was so...odd, and im in such a different place now...with myself and everyone around me. this year has probably been the most life changing though...by the time i got the balls to trust a couple people i got quite a suprise...last year i would have NEVER trusted anyone...i would have never talked to people about things about me...and most of all...i would have never stuck up for myself. its funny...Derrick wanted to "help me trust" ...now that i think of that it makes me luagh...i did trust him and he totally shit all over it....yeah...if that wont make me trust i dont know what will.lol but through my trusting...i have found Oz. and for that i am glad. Its funny...i was thinking about why i have had so many relationships and none have them have worked....i didnt want them too...i wouldnt open myself to trust...i didnt truely want to get close to anyone at all....im so glad that when i did..i found him instead of some asshole.lol damn...im so lucky

man...crazy...i just read Oz's journal entry...goodtimes man...good times. wow that means alot to me....i agree with him 100% ...ive thought about it a few times...its funny...i used to be sooo against the "comitment" and such with everyother guy...i always wanted to be alone. But with Oz its different...i know i never have to pretend...he knows who i am...i know who he is...i would love to be around him constantly...its funny how one person can change you so much. man...he really is the one for me isnt he?