Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
Well you're just across the street
Looks a mile to my feet
I want to go to you
Funny how I'm nervous still
I've always been the easy kill
I guess I always will
Could it be that everything goes round by chance
Or only one way that it was always meant to be
You kill me, you always know the perfect thing to say
Hey hey, hey hey
I know what I should do but I just can't walk away
I can picture your face well
From the bar in my hotel
I wish I'd go to you
I'll pick up, put down the phone
Like your favorite Heatmeiser song goes
It's just like being alone
Oh god please don't tell me this has been in vain
I need answers for what all the waiting I've done means
You kill me, you've got some nerve but can't face your mistakes
Hey hey, hey hey
I know what I should do but I just can't turn away
(Away, away)
So go on love
Leave while there's still hope for escape
You gotta take what you can these days
There's so much ahead
And so much regret
I know what you want to say
I know it but can't help feeling differently
I loved you
And I should have said it
Tell me just what has it ever meant
I can't help it baby, this is who I am
Sorry but I can't just go turn off how I feel
You kill me, you build me up but just to watch me break
Hey hey, hey hey
I know what I should do but I just can't walk away
Looks a mile to my feet
I want to go to you
Funny how I'm nervous still
I've always been the easy kill
I guess I always will
Could it be that everything goes round by chance
Or only one way that it was always meant to be
You kill me, you always know the perfect thing to say
Hey hey, hey hey
I know what I should do but I just can't walk away
I can picture your face well
From the bar in my hotel
I wish I'd go to you
I'll pick up, put down the phone
Like your favorite Heatmeiser song goes
It's just like being alone
Oh god please don't tell me this has been in vain
I need answers for what all the waiting I've done means
You kill me, you've got some nerve but can't face your mistakes
Hey hey, hey hey
I know what I should do but I just can't turn away
(Away, away)
So go on love
Leave while there's still hope for escape
You gotta take what you can these days
There's so much ahead
And so much regret
I know what you want to say
I know it but can't help feeling differently
I loved you
And I should have said it
Tell me just what has it ever meant
I can't help it baby, this is who I am
Sorry but I can't just go turn off how I feel
You kill me, you build me up but just to watch me break
Hey hey, hey hey
I know what I should do but I just can't walk away
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it sometimes freaks me out how much i can relate to this song. and I know everyone says that, but i really mean it. i had an affair with a married guy who lived across the street. he said some amazing things to me, built me up so high, but then watched as i made my fantastic fall. in the end, he still had someone and i was alone.