so i finally got those two songs from the scion commercial, and until about three today jess randi and i were dancing around to them and making m&m pancakes in my kitchen. afterwards, we got lost in an abandoned mill and sat on the roof, made soup, and cupcakes. it has been a good day. although, apparently my face is an eon (says ryan). and im a pringle dick. anyways. tomorrow is going to be great. to be honest, i dont care where we go to eat, or what movie we see. i havent seen him in too long, so i think im subconsciously mad at him. yeah, my shit works that way. other that than im doing well, my thumb is still in a half a piece but whatever, its just impairs my ability to kill hookers and steal cars. oh, and use a flamethrower. but thats okay. "your voice sounds a little young?" "its alright, bye." "rachel, if you cant speak obscenities, you become one." "dumb stupid piece of crap!" "eh, i think ill just rape her on the off chance shes into that shit." i love my friends, i love my boyfriend, i love the summer air.. i feel it already.

i made apple pie today, and cut the tip of my thumb off! i am currently bleeding through my second bandaid, and its really hard to type without using your thumb, when you type properly anyway. well, today sorts of sucks. probably not doing anything, not until later at least, and im buhleeding profusely! thats all.

i like vaida, and dade. how can anybody go on breathing when true love ends? its like a car crash, but it never stops colliding. they keep slamming into eachother, until they completely surpass one another. and then the whole world just keeps turning. vaida is jealous, sometimes i wonder if im jealous. i dont think i am, but sometimes i want to be anyone but me. sometimes i wonder if self hatred and jealousy are the same. boyfriend told me he would never want another girl. i dont know how he has changed so much, but im praying to god he stays this way. he told me he knew, that day i stopped talkig to him, he knew it couldnt end like that. i guess he was right.. so how is this going to end? who knows. who knows.

extra large entry. so today was my first actual day of classes, and as expected, it sucked some huge ass. but its okay because im getting my hair cut tonight! not that you know what i look like anyway, but to me its exciting all the same. i cant wait for saturday, though. salvatore is taking me out to see Drag Me To Hell and then out to dinner. plus, his moms moving out soon so the apartment is his. and mine. haha he just doesnt know that yet, im sure. anyways, life is turning in a good direction as of right now. although now that ive said that, tomorrow the eastern hemisphere is going to get nuked. but whatever, at least id die happy. his mother whispers quietly; heavens not a place that you go when you die. its that moment in life when you actually feel alive and i do, i do feel alive. summer is coming up and i already have so much planned. cape and new hampshire with jess, randi, and jen. maybe maine with tara? warped tour with jess and boyfriend, lots of boyfriend, and who can forget the beach and the endless summer nights? this is definitely going to be the best summer of my life. bring it on.

city any colour brings back so many memories. so many feelings, so many good ones. ive been known to fall in love, but sometimes love just is not enough. and my heart will stray before too long. dallas green is a cheater cheater pumpkin eater, and i love him. i love acoustic singers with good voices. theyre so soothing, and they make me so happy. if you know of any, please let me know. you know my shit

in house suspension today. it was so much fun! we had a really cute sub at first, and i filled up almost my entire drawing book. six hours of drawing, talking, listening to music, and hanging out. legit. also, beach next month! im wicked excited, going with greg jess sal jon and jen. well, or so we hope. swimming tomorrow, and getting my hair cut. boyfriend today, for like, twenty minutes, but whatever. im still just happy i get to see him. summers coming, which mean skating is too. currently im working up to one hundred fifty dollars, for a new deck, trucks, bindings, and wheels. woo! also, i love wifeswap.

these are my final thoughts, my succession from the union, if you will. I was lied to, betrayed, and hurt. But as all friendships end, it was very much expected. If anybody was "harassed" in this situation, it was me; i was done one month ago. But no, you couldnt make up your mind, and you couldn't shut your fat mouth. but i digress. i think that, in the whole, every single person was in the wrong, some more than others, sure. but overall, i do not regret a single word ive said, nor do i owe a single apology. im sixteen years old, not six. however, i wish that the two of you had acted that way as well. the rumors you spread, and the chit chatting you do behind my back is quite enjoyable, to be quite frank. but you have to grow out of diapers sometime, dont you? lindsey: for the entirety of our friendship, we hadnt fought once. we were the quintessence of friendship. but i suppose all good things must come to and end. so i wish you luck, and i hope you have a good seventeenth birthday , and i wish you and alex well. kellie: seeing as your not out of pullups yet, ill use small words. shut up. as for our "friendship" (my god i love quotaions) i dont think a close one ever really existed. which is fine, but it also gives you the bullshit hand when you try to spread rumors about me. i just thought you might like to know that. and to all of my true friends, thank you. i needed you and you came to support me. you rejected the lies and you stood up for me. i love you guys. and this is the end.

so, why just take everything i said to you and repeat it to me? id love for you to just shut the fuck up, but you being exactly like your mother, you just cant do that now can you. well, heres to the last word, its up for the taking. because for all i care you can shove it up your ass and have it get lost in that never ending abyss. now for the purpose im here. stupid boyfriends with stupid moms. stupid moms with stupid.. stupid. fuck, i dont know. i dont even know why im upset, i still get to see him. but i hate it when i only see him for an hour. i dont know, especially with his mom being here and all.. who knows. who knows.

Taylor (6:05:16 PM): 1. ur not cheating on Sal 2. i'm pretty sure you dont smoke pot al the time (hopefully not at all...) 3.youre not dropping out, I wont allow it 4. u do th piercings because u want to i dont know why it makes me so happy to know i have friends standing behind me to back me up. was that satire? or sarcasm.. i cant tell. ANYWAY. tomorrow boyfriends mom wants to talk to my mother about our relationship. with us there. its going to be so awkward, but it will definitely make us more stable. us and our cheating selves! although, i dont know if his moms my biggest fan. she doesnt hate me i hope, but id rather her like me at least, than anything less. life is too short to waste on these, these, these.

lindsey: please get the fuck out of my life. think and say whatever you want, but leave me alone. and keep your bullshit on your side of the pen ms. im better than everybody because i think im so sophisticated but really im just bitter. kellie: nobody believes you, sorry to say. and since your "friends" are my friends, theyre coming to me. so, thanks for trying. ANYWAY, god damn. i love highschool. also, well.. i dont really have much else to say. except i fucked the school over today and i am still going to the hospital in june. whatever, lifes too short to care about anything!