tidied my room then went to lenadoon. told dean. he didn't seem bothered at all. he broke up with me and asked who i cheated with and told me he was planning on hitting him. wow. i was expecting him to be angrier. long story about what happened with pierce & lulu. i'll edit later.

went to the rotterdam last night with paddy, tasha and leigh. we met rupert grint (ron weasley from harry potter) and james nesbitt! we got pictures :D i texted kris while i was there saying "s'happenin?" and he said he was in the globe and then an hour later he rang me but i couldn't hear him so i hung up. then after we got a taxi home kris rang me at quarter to 2 and asked me to go to his new house. he was clrly drunk. i said i couldn't but i said he could come down and he told me he'd would come down. he got to my house at half 3 and we sat in the computer room with paddy and tasha. he then jumped up and walked out of the room and i followed him. we went into my room and we were talking and he said "i have to go home" then i said "no stay, don't leave me with paddy and tasha. he then said "give me a kiss...give me a reason to stay" so i did. then he said "no! i have to go home" i asked why and he said "you're too cute!" then he went out and spoke to my mum and her mate colette who were in the kitchen. colette didn't like him. she thought he was too cocky. we then went back into the computer room and then tasha and paddy left. and kris kept kissing me and i was like "someone's gonna walk in" and he said "i like a risk" i got up and went into my room and saw that paddy and tasha were in the top bunk. me and kris came in and slept on the bottom bunk. then he started feeling me up and said "would you feel weird if i licked your pussy?" and i said no. so y'know...he did. then i was all, feeling him and he said "did we ever do a 69 when we went out?" and i said "once" then he asked if i wanted to go for it so i did. a bit into it, kris froze and got me to lie beside him. he said "we just got caught. big time." he told me tasha had peeked her head over the side and saw us. then we just went to sleep. then we woke up because we heard kris's phone ringing in the computer room so he jumped up and got it. when he came back in he lay beside me and started feeling me up and kissing me again. then he said "you still owe me a blowjob from last night." then after more kissing he said "it's a pity we don't have any condoms. i'd love to fuck you." so i told him i had some and gave him one. so we...did it. we fell asleep again and when we woke up i gave kris head. then about 10 mins later he left. i was texting him and he said he felt like a dick etcetc. paddy said that he doesn't approve of what i done and he feels like a dick because he didn't say anything. tasha said "what's done is done" i need to tell dean now. shitting it. went to lenadoon and dean wasn't out. i told charlie. he was annoyed. and he told me that he didn't think dean would forgive me and he said dean's gonna kill kris. pierce said that he's sorta on kris's side a little bit. i told pierce everything. from dean cancelling on me on friday....to....everything.

forgot to write here yesterday again! went up to lenadoon yesterday. dean got his tattoo - 'made in belfast' across his forearm but the 'a's are anarchy signs lol. today i went into town with brendan & lauren. met charlie and bought a dress. then i went to meet tasha after work and i got a wee belt and necklace to go with it for tomorrow night. can't wait! :D came home and slept from 9 - 11. nowwww, i'm so bouncy :D

oh noes. i haven't been keeping up to date with my journal recently, have i? yesterday my mum went shopping and my dad took my sister to see kung fu panda so i had the house to myself. anto shannon called down and then an hour later dean called and anto left. me and dean went to see ash. i feel so sorry for her. her summer's been so shit, what with being in hospital for most of it. then we went to lenadoon. was pretty shit but when is it ever good? me and dean had a slight arguement. nothing serious. but i haven't spoken to him at all today which is pretty unusual. he was supposed to be getting his tattoo today. i finally decided what tattoos i want. the star on the background of the clash's "the singles" album. the remastered edition, that is. with the words "know your rights" underneath it. and i want it on my lower arm under the elbow. also: the stars on the mescaleros album "streetcore". but i dunno what to get first :( i need to redye my hair. the green's going a yellowy/brown colour. it's horrible.

i could have sworn i wrote an entry on thursday night talking about how i went to the twins (shauneen & siobhan), jamie and shea's house with dean =S. oh well. was in tasha's caravan in carnlough from friday til today. was really good. i'll edit this about it when i could be bothered (:

paddy came down today so me, tasha and paddy went to lenadoon and no-one was out and then it started pissing down so we went to mine and then dean called. we sat in mine for a bit and then paddy had to get his train so he and tasha walked to the train station. me and dean sat in mine for agggges. eva drew him and picture & all ^_^ it was so cute.

i forgot to write here yesterday. and i can't even remember what i did. i went to lenadoon, that i know. today i headed into town with tasha. she got her creepers and black hair dye, i got my new phone (sony ericsson w880i) unlocked and brought my tartans back. visited ash in hospital. she was so pale. i feel really sorry for her. came home and my mum had bought me shoes. these wee tartan dolly shoes. they're lovely (: went to lenadoon. was alright like. nothing special. gonna ring dean tomorrow at half 11 to wake him up. if i'm awake by then that is.

had a pretty amazing weekend. headed into town with lulu on saturday and got an application form for craftworld. we then met helen, tasha and paddy in town and headed up to mine til tasha got changed and sean-paul and pierce met us there. got the bus into town and everyone went into the cinema apart from me and lulu because dean was gonna be late so us three sat at botanic for a bit. we then all headed to lenadoon and had a bit've a swall. paddy and tasha were staying in my house and dean and sean-paul walked us down so they came in for a bit and ended up staying too. dean was out talking to my parents for aggges, trying to get into their good books. it worked too. sean-paul passed out and dean cock slapped him, cut his sock, cut his shoelace and attempted to shave his eyebrow off. dean and sean-paul left quite early and me, tasha and paddy woke up at 5pm and made noodles lol! paddy bleached his hair and dyed it green, tasha dyed her hair red again and i dyed mine green and blue. dean told me he loved me last night. i wasn't even creeped out. i told him i loved him too =)

bleached my hair again today. it's peach now. it's in terrible condition but apparently everyone likes the colour. met charlie at the doctor's today then headed to his house with him then down to the park. hackett came out after a while then pierce & lulu. lulu got her new phone. then lulu and pierce went to pierce's and charlie went home then dean came. and then hackett went home so me and dean walked to subway cuz i really wanted an italian bmt lol. we waited outside iceland for sean-paul to meet us and we had a heart-to-heart. dean was going on about how me and him were 2 years ago and the whole "cheating on me with kirstie" thing. he told me that i was always in the back of his mind and he thought he loved kirstie but he rly didn't. he said he regretted breaking up with me. he said "i don't know how you felt back then...actually, how did you feel?" so i said "honestly? when we broke up it crushed me. it took me ages to get over you." and when i said that i honestly thought dean was gonna cry. then he hugged me and said "i'm so sorry" then i said "but you have me again now" and he said "and i'm not letting you go again" haha. sean-paul went to the hunting lodge and dean got me a wee bottle of kopparberg. went to the park for a bit and dean left at 9. i headed home about an hour later. good day like.