Self Help

All I have right now is right here
And right now
I want what I want, I always have
When no one cared about me, dreams were all I had
But nightmares grow and no one's listening
And idle thoughts'll do their thing
I still feel so much pain here from the past
And it cuts like a knife
It feels like a fight
To take back your life
Searching for the meaning
I'm living in these feelings
I'm ready for a reason to believe
Now I'm working on my insides
'Cause outside there's no reasoning
[?] it's never what it seems
All I have right now is right here
I felt too bad about myself
I never thought I was good enough for anybody else
I couldn't look love in the eye
I was too broken to try
Life was a cold song that taught me not to cry
And it cuts like a knife
It feels like a fight
To take back your life
Searching for the meaning
I'm living in these feelings
I'm ready for a reason to believe
Now I'm working on my insides
'Cause outside there's no reasoning
[?] it's never what it seems
How long I'm waiting
Feeling lost, frustrated
Locked out and I'm on my own
[?] got no place to go
How long should I stay here all alone
Searching for the meaning
I'm living in these feelings
I'm ready for a reason to believe
Now I'm working on my insides
'Cause outside there's no reasoning
[?] it's never what it seems