This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Stayin' up for days on end
Then sleeping long enough
Wasting all the cash on bets
We're so disorganized
Making up all our own rules
And happy for a while
Failing all the time
No matter how it's justified
Dreaming of the day
We have some alternative plans
Like holding hands
And staring up
And counting little stars
Smart enough to know
It's sort of just a little joke
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
Charging all around the town
And losing all the games
Breaking up the rules we made
We are so unsocialized
Cheating on the brain
We have no answers of our own
Faking all the time
No matter what our hearts desire
Dreaming of the day
We have some alternative plans
Like holding hands
And staring up
And counting little stars
Smart enough to know
It's sort of just a little joke
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
It's always in the cartoons
Nobody really understands me
My heart is made of cardboard
I never thought you'd go away
Stayin' up for days on end
Then sleeping long enough
Wasting all the cash on bets
We're so disorganized
Cheating on the brain
We have no answers of our own
Faking all the time
No matter what our hearts desire
Dreaming of the day
We have some alternative plans
Like holding hands
And staring up
And counting little stars
Smart enough to know
It's sort of just a little joke
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
Then sleeping long enough
Wasting all the cash on bets
We're so disorganized
Making up all our own rules
And happy for a while
Failing all the time
No matter how it's justified
Dreaming of the day
We have some alternative plans
Like holding hands
And staring up
And counting little stars
Smart enough to know
It's sort of just a little joke
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
Charging all around the town
And losing all the games
Breaking up the rules we made
We are so unsocialized
Cheating on the brain
We have no answers of our own
Faking all the time
No matter what our hearts desire
Dreaming of the day
We have some alternative plans
Like holding hands
And staring up
And counting little stars
Smart enough to know
It's sort of just a little joke
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
It's always in the cartoons
Nobody really understands me
My heart is made of cardboard
I never thought you'd go away
Stayin' up for days on end
Then sleeping long enough
Wasting all the cash on bets
We're so disorganized
Cheating on the brain
We have no answers of our own
Faking all the time
No matter what our hearts desire
Dreaming of the day
We have some alternative plans
Like holding hands
And staring up
And counting little stars
Smart enough to know
It's sort of just a little joke
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
I'm sorry
I never meant to be like this
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This is one of my favorite songs. https://fnfgo.io
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I think your first comment is closer to being accurate. The singer/song writers state "Millions of eyes can see, yet why am i so blind!? When the someone else is me, its unkind its unkind". I believe hes referring to the girl toying with him and using him. He wants something deeper with her, thats why he allows himself to be as a puppet (even though for her fun and games) as long as it makes her happy. But he knows deep down that she doesnt really want to be serious with him and thats what makes him.
Magical
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Blue
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“Blue” is a song about a love that is persisting in the discomfort of the person experiencing the emotion. Ed Sheeran reflects on love lost, and although he wishes his former partner find happiness, he cannot but admit his feelings are still very much there. He expresses the realization that he might never find another on this stringed instrumental by Aaron Dessner.