The song lyrics were written by the band Van Halen, as they were asked to write a song for the 1979 movie "Over the Edge" starring Matt Dillon. The movie (and the lyrics, although more obliquely) are about bored, rebellious youth with nothing better to do than get into trouble. If you see the movie, these lyrics will make more sense. It's a great movie if you grew up in the 70s/80s you'll definitely remember some of these characters from your own life. Fun fact, after writing the song, Van Halen decided not to let the movie use it.
(Spoken Word)
Learning to love life by living through loss andmistakes,
Lessons Learned then gradually surfacing/
Letting go,
Stripping naked to scream/
I am not perfect, nor do I strive to be/
I am alive in this world of face first falls and public breakdowns/
I'm a retarded dis figured clown, dying to be heard for the simple art of letting this heavy wall finally fall/
I'm an equal being of no race, or color, a hallucination if you will/
Sneaking into the the lives of strangers and letting them fall apart to a new rhythm/
Just to feel better.
G
Learning to love life by living through loss andmistakes,
Lessons Learned then gradually surfacing/
Letting go,
Stripping naked to scream/
I am not perfect, nor do I strive to be/
I am alive in this world of face first falls and public breakdowns/
I'm a retarded dis figured clown, dying to be heard for the simple art of letting this heavy wall finally fall/
I'm an equal being of no race, or color, a hallucination if you will/
Sneaking into the the lives of strangers and letting them fall apart to a new rhythm/
Just to feel better.
G
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In regards to the meaning of this song:
Before a live performance on the EP Five Stories Falling, Geoff states “It’s about the last time I went to visit my grandmother in Columbus, and I saw that she was dying and it was the last time I was going to see her. It is about realizing how young you are, but how quickly you can go.”
That’s the thing about Geoff and his sublime poetry, you think it’s about one thing, but really it’s about something entirely different. But the lyrics are still universal and omnipresent, ubiquitous, even. So relatable. That’s one thing I love about this band. I also love their live performances, raw energy and Geoff’s beautiful, imperfectly perfect vocals. His voice soothes my aching soul.
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I think much like another song “Anti-Matter” (that's also on the same album as this song), this one is also is inspired by a horrifying van crash the band experienced on Nov 3, 2022. This, much like the other track, sounds like it's an extension what they shared while huddled in the wreckage, as they helped frontman Garrett Russell stem the bleeding from his head wound while he was under the temporary effects of a concussion. The track speaks of where the mind goes at the most desperate & desolate of times, when it just about slips away to all but disconnect itself, and the aftermath.
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Ed Sheeran tells a story of unsuccessfully trying to feel “Amazing.” This track is about the being weighed down by emotional stress despite valiant attempts to find some positivity in the situation. This track was written by Ed Sheeran from the perspective of his friend. From the track, we see this person fall deeper into the negative thoughts and slide further down the path of mental torment with every lyric.
DISCLAIMER I have just obtained a copy of Justin Furstenfeld's book Crazy Making. It's not very detailed, but it contains all the lyrics to all current (The Answers - Approaching Normal) Blue October songs, and his inspiration behind them. As I said, it's not very detailed, but it's his words on every Blue October song that is in the book. I know everyone interprets a song differently from everyone else, but having the original intent behind the song will be helpful to people who don't fully understand a song. Also, any grammatical errors are not made by me, I'm putting down Justin's words exactly how he writes them. So yea... enjoy :)
Retarded Disfigured Clown: "My mentor, Mr. Blue Miller read this for me cuz he was the 1st pure heart I'd met in the music ind. Named my daughter after him"