...A Distance There Is...

To me it seems like the lament of a ghost, dead as a result of the carelessness of her lover... Still, there are parts i dont really get...

Theatre of Tragedy is mostly in Old/Middle English, the following is my non-scholarly translation of the text of the song, with interpretative notations.

"Come in out of the rain thou sayest -" ~You told me to come in out of the rain

"But thou ne'er step'st aside;" ~But you did not ever stepped aside ~(Meaning that "you", the Subject, stood in the door way not letting the ~speaker in)

"And I am trapp'd -" ~and I am trapped ~(outside maybe, or perhaps a reference to the relationship between the ~narrator and the Subject, or even perhaps a reference to the Speaker's own ~feelings being unchangeable.)

"A distance there is..." ~(This line isn't hard to understand in definition, but it has so many possible ~interpretations. It could mean between the Speaker and the Subject, or the ~Speaker and safety. It could ever refer to an emotional distance between the ~Speaker and her emotional state versus what she does during the song.)

"None, save me and the #[bodkin] - pitter-patter on the roof:" ~There isn't anyone here but me and the [knife], the knocking sound on the ~roof [Bodkin has several possible definitions, it can be either a thin sharp ~instrument for making holes in leather, a long sharp hairpin, or a blunt ~needle-like instrument from drawing tape or cord through a hem. However, the ~oldest meaning is a small dagger or stiletto, which all of the other definitions ~would resemble some what. Whatever she has in hand it's a stabbing ~instrument.]

"Behold! - 'tis not the rain; thence me it has to be -" ~See! It isn't the rain, therefore it has to be me -

"I will not drink thy vintage wine, my dear;" ~I won't drink your old wine, my dear; ~(Perhaps something the lines of "I won't drink the Punch" or "I won't put ~myself in danger because you offer me something.")

"Thou hast heed'd that I am of innocence, yet thou let'st thy lass into peril -" ~You had understood that I was chaste intention, but you let your girl into ~danger -

"Thou let'st me be [parched];" ~You let me be [deprived of natural water or thirsty]

"My heart is of frailty, my pale skin is hued [damask]." ~My heart (physical and/or metaphorical) is of weakness, my pale skin is ~colored cloth/steel/red-grey [Damask can refer to three things: a thin but firm ~cloth made of one woof and one weft thread, reversible since the patterns ~show up on either side, OR Damask can be a reference to Damascus steel, ~OR it can refer to a greyish red. Here's where the real beauty of the lyrics ~shows, because the narrator can either be saying that she's of thin cloth, or a ~steel which is even today known as one of the hardest things ever forged by ~man and it also has a nice third meaning that fits more with the idea that ~she's terribly grieved.]

"When thou thy tears hast hidden, "Come back!", thou sayest -" ~When you've hidden your own tears you ask me to come back -

"There I soon am to be - but how am I to run when my bones, my heart!" ~I'll be there soon - but how can I run when my bones, my heart

"Thou hast me bereaft? -" ~You have [parted] from me ~*[Bereaft is another complicated word, it can mean lacking some non-material ~asset, or if in reference to a person it can mean lonely or abandoned by. Here ~we have it seeming to refer to physical/metaphorical parts of herself, so it ~seems to almost have the meaning of the Subject having stolen these things ~from the Speaker. However, it could also referring to a parting between them.]

"But run thou sayest; I run -" ~However run you say; I run - ~(The Speaker acquiesced to the Subject's demand for her to flee)

"And there and then I behold that a time will come when I again dead will be." ~And in that place and during that time I see that there will be a time when I ~am dead again. ~(Perhaps in refrence to punishment the Speaker will suffer, or perhaps

"Thou tell'st me to leave without delay -" ~You tell me to go immediately

"I leave with my #[bodkin] and my tears in my hands;" ~I go with my #[knife] and my tears in my hands

"Lo! - the shadows, the sky - descending;" ~Look! - the shadows and the sky - lowering/looming

"So by a dint of smite I gait ere I run and melt together with dusk." ~So by the force of a blow I gave before I flee and become part of the darkness.

"In my mind in which is this event," ~It's in my mind that this happening takes place,

"But it seems as if naught is to change anyway?" ~However is looks as though nothing is going to change in spite of it?

"After all these years thou left'st me down in the [emotional depths] -" ~After all this time in which you left me down in [despair?] ~*[This is a hard one to pin down because the Speaker is vague about what ~type of depths, generally though it's connotation is of a negative sort so I'm ~translating here as despair.]

"The sombre soaked velvet-drape is hung upon me," ~The darkness soaked velvet cloth is placed on top of me ~(Possibly in refrence to a shroud or pall, some sort of mourning cloth at the ~very least)

"Turning my feelings away from our so ignorant world:" ~Turns my back upon our civilization which is lacking in knowledge or ~understanding ~(The Speaker seems to be blocking out the civilization which doesn't ~understand her.)

"All the beatiful moments shared, deliberatlely push'd aside -" ~The entirety of the events that were special to the pair of them either ignored ~or turned away from -

"...a distance there is..." ~(And again the enigmatic line, not any clearer for those in between, just as ~ambiguous as the first time, possibly adding a distance between the Speaker ~and Reality, since she admits that the stabbing is incident she made up even ~though the phraseology coming before that doesn't support it. I sincerely feel ~the Speaker is an Unreliable Source.)

Further Note: As to what the song means, there are a couple of interepretations. Either the speaker was rejected after being led on OR else was coerced into a relationship of some form that later goes wrong. She either strikes with a knife her Subject, OR perhaps she didn't, it was all in her head. Then she either leaves the Subject's home at the Subject's request OR runs away because she has stabbed that person. No matter what happened the world doesn't understand her, and possibly not the Subject either (whether dead or alive is irrelevant).

No matter what actually happened (or didn't?) one thing is undisputable. The Speaker is extremely upset and possibly depressed about the whole thing.

Or

Perhaps she simply has delusions of persecution.