dont fucking jerk me around fuck it will end worse for you

seeing him yesterday was awkward.. but not at the same time. It should have been, but I sort of enjoyed it Too bad we cant just start fresh, and I wouldnt care how my friends judge me oh well Last night was fun, girls night! really, I love my friends. For the most part. I'm honestly very lucky, and have nothing to complain about

I was suppose to be the one to hurt him My plan was to lead him on, then ditch him So we make these plans for tonight we talked for two hours today I was so nice and completely led him to believe that i was sincere and now hes the one who hasnt called me karma i guess k never mind, he just called and i said he was too late Now im just confused and hurt fuckkkkk I have gotten cute texts for the past few days from a cute guy. If he didnt live in a different province, i would for sure like him. He keeps sending texts saying he misses me, and making plans for next time we see each other. aww and he was so cutee the way he kissed me last weekend. I like the way he texts me for no reason, just to say sweet things.

sure ill go on a date with you sure ill sleepover sure i trust you dick move! dont make me laugh

yea yea i win the bet! i didnt drink last night and i wont tonight either last night i really felt like getting some sleep, so i went to bed early feeling good. Of course i get woken up, numerous times. first some guy calls me asking me if i want to go out then he calls again half an hour later. after falling asleep again, my phone rings again i use self control, and the fact i was asleep to ignore it. but it rings again right away so i answer it. it was another guy wanting me to go out, but again i declined. (p.s not going out takes a lot of lazyness/self-control) so i talked to the guy for awhile, and then went back to sleep. at 4:00 am i get a text, and my phone beeps every two minutes until i answer it. so i wake myself up and read it, and it was from an unknown number and it intrigued me. well it was actually some guy on another guys phone, wanting me to meet up with them. being almost morning, and i worked in three hours i didnt go out. but i did talk to them for about an hour. I dont have the kind of self control to be able to ignore a ringing phone. its aweful on my part. And seeing missed calls just kills me with curiosity, even though i usually know why someone is calling one of these nights i will get a full night sleep, i wont go out, and i wont answer my phone, and i wont have to work early in the morning, and i wont have people over, i will fall asleep on my couch and it will be bliss. sheer bliss

drunk again, fuck

in an innocent way I thought it could stay with us both on the ground, with us fooling around. lets just stay on the ground, lets stay fooling around on the ground.

I'm so exhausted This morning i was woken up by my phone at least three times, and so i gave up and got up I feel like i could go to bed and sleep for days, but most likely i will go drinking again tonight. Honestly i need some goddamn self-control. About an hour ago some guy called me, he knew me but i dont remember him at all. He said he met me last weekend. He asked if i wanted to do something tonight. The weird thing was that the people he wanted me to hang out with were the people i already had plans with. He told me he would call me back, but it will be so awkward going out with them tonight..really though, i dont know how he even has my number. So i have massive amount of homework.. boo it sucks. Not the kind of homework i can avoid either.

its 4:30 am, im so drunk why the fuck am i on the computer? really, i should learn people names

So I made a deal with one of my life long friends that i wouldnt drink for a month... it started as a joke, but when she didnt believe i could pull it off we made a bet on it. That was about two weeks ago and since then I have been drunk or drinking about four or five times. I should stop. I really should. I got my drivers license though! such freedom! The other day I test drove a Toyota camry. It is sort of old, but it great condition because it hasnt been driven much. The price is good for my limited funds though. Its such a good deal though because its right hand drive... meaning the wheel is on the passenger side. Driving it was sort of fun though. So the guy I thought i was completly over started talking to me again. fuck. he asked if he could ask me out sometime, and said he thinks about me a lot. Men are more complicated than women! or maybe just the males in my life. who knows. Today someone sent me a sweet email.