Well, the moment arrived, and the moment passed. Sort of. Actually, the moment took a break, and came back for a surprise visit in the early AM. While the moment certainly provided an inspiration of creativity, it was a bit...unusual. The swelling tide of emotional turbulence has resumed, and will undoubtably rear its' head, threatening to overwhelm those in its' path. Despite this, I stand resolute, unyielding and unbending in the face of it. I am nevertheless caught up in it. I am pulled into a frenzy of passion and more: questions of longevity alongside the feeling of liquid heat running through my veins. And, the veins of one other. There are questions, that I have been asked, and I have asked myself many of the very same questions. The answers are of course different. The circumstances of those answering are different. I will have to speak my piece at some point in the future: I will simply have to make time, and say what is in my mind. I must remember what the questions are. With time served with an Ocean and a Continent dividing, my series of Strange Adventures continues, apparently unabated.

The day is upon me now where people in my life who were briefly absent return. This marks a period of some apprehension and nervousness. Songs echo in my mind, such as The Call "Let The Day Begin", The The "This Is The Day", Lou Reed "Perfect Day", The Cure "Close To Me". Going Forward.

Well, my beloved Redskins stopped the hemmoraging. My one friends' daughter is doing better, although still a ways away from "okay". My other friend managed to get out the house for a bit, but he and his new son are doing fine. My former roommate comes home Wednesday, and my current roommate comes home tomorrow. I have no real idea of how I'm doing in all this. If that makes me sound a little off mentally, then you are not far from correct. My mind is a swirling cacophany of thoughts and emothins, some conflicting, others simply disjointed I would really like it if things at work slowed to a crawl, at least as far as my position goes (I don't actually do anything to generate revenue, so that would not be harmful to the Bottom Line). I'd just like to have 7.5 hours to decompress, and unfortunately, that isn't looking likely. It seems more like there are (a small number) of folks who want to pile more crap on for me to do. If they have enough time to decide I'm not busy enough, then they aren't either. I need to wrap my head together and get back to my self-improvements: martial arts, weight training, etc. At times it is so easy to fall into inactivity, and then it's hard to get back out again. I have at least been able to maintain the discipline of Journal Keeping, by-and-large for several weeks now. At this point, I am actively keeping three distinct journals, although after Tuesday, it goes down to two again. I think it's time for me to consider quitting smoking again.

Well, one friend has a child in the hospital after ODing on Lithium. Another friend just had a beuatiful baby boy born into their family.

Well, yesterday was something of a pisser to start with. It ended differently however. Surprisingly well, all things considered. I'll still be happy to see the weekend, and to see some days where I don't have so much stuff to do, but can instead concentrate on leisure pusuits. Time to keep my "other" journal now.

Today is one of those days where you are up for 24 hours. I will however get the chance to make up for it later. Sometimes, a friend really needs you. And you answer the call. Sometimes you accidentally wrong a friend. However unintentional, the hurt is very real, and so you do the right thing by your earlier indiscretion. Sometimes you feel compelled to say something, but for whatever reason, you withold it: You keep silent. In any event, sometimes you manage to assuage the situation and make an amend of sorts.

Getting back on track. Glad to see the weekend. Work drives me crazy. Payday makes it a bonus score, although I have some big bills to pay/catch-up on. I'm looking forward to the Winter, but I could do without the Holiday Season. Pray for my beloved Redskins this Sunday. Looking like a fairly busy weekend ahead of me. But a busy weekend is far better than a slow day in the office.

Been a few days. Been sick. Today is a good day for Rain songs. Led Zeppelin: The Rain Song. Jesus And Mary Chain: Happy When It Rains. Nine Million Rainy Days. Bob Dylan: Hard Rain's Gonna Fall. Garbage: Only Happy When It Rains. Beatles: Rain. Just to name a few. The rain has little to do with my down mood, and being sick has only a little to do with it either. There is however, an impending sense of loss on the horizon.

And so here we are at the end of a short week (the lesser payoff to the three day weekend). I am only too happy to leave behind the office for yet another weekend, although there are times when I find the weekdays are more fruitful than the weekends. I am drawn as a moth to the flame, and the flame itself is a living mercurial thing, all at once beautiful and frightening in its' intensity. At times a stabilizing element, and at other times a wildly unsettling wrench in the machine. There are emotions of not only myself, but others bound up in the works. There is a tale of epic proportions and it revolves around love, loss, heartache, and self-introspection. A quest for fulfillment, a need for self-protection, and preparation for the daily struggle that is Life itself. And this story is far from over, although portions of it are drawing to a conclusion might might call "inevitable". What the weekend brings remains to be seen.

Okay: I was down sick yesterday, so I made no attempt at making an entry (although I felt better in the late afternoon, so I should have). As ever, I hate the phone. No other single device is more disrutive, invasive and intrusive as is the telephone. I find myself thinking about dreams. A friend recently shared a very interesting dream with me, and I have spent several hours re-reading the description, and turning it over in my mind. I am once again the proud owner of Sigue Sigue Sputniks' Flaunt It. Yay, Amazon.Com. Still feeling mixed up romantically. Issues to be resolved, and the time to do so is evaporating like evening mist in the Sahara Sun. Ticking away the hours until it's Quitting Time. Life is so much better outside of work.