The song lyrics were written by the band Van Halen, as they were asked to write a song for the 1979 movie "Over the Edge" starring Matt Dillon. The movie (and the lyrics, although more obliquely) are about bored, rebellious youth with nothing better to do than get into trouble. If you see the movie, these lyrics will make more sense. It's a great movie if you grew up in the 70s/80s you'll definitely remember some of these characters from your own life. Fun fact, after writing the song, Van Halen decided not to let the movie use it.
"A" is for "Apple"
"B" is for "Balloons"
"C" is for "Crayons"
"D" is for "Drum"
Like my scrotum here it is in a nutshell
One thousand nine hundred and seventy-two
That's the year I got here when my dear mother's water blew
Not really realizing the prize that's been begot to her
The bona fide lo-fi high-octane philosopher
Genius with a penis the few the proud the me
I liked me so much I had to buy the company
Soul for sale sold to Satan for a hell of a lotta luck
I'm hard to come by like a straight guy working at Starbucks
Thank the thinkers that think they thunk the thoughts that theorized
Idolized or despised bet I'm gettin' recognized
Mount Rushmore it? No ignore it can't rock with no big head
Half of the people want me half of the people want me dead
I am the Angel of Def with my rhymes against humanity
Teeter-tottering between brilliance and insanity
The one part the Fuehrer the one part the Pope
It's the inevitable return baby of the Great White Dope
Conclusions you drew proportions you blew
Lost son of Iggy? False Bigger nose than Ziggy? True
Yes my name is Jimmy Pop no my pop's name is Dick
Don't admit to kick it slick you thick derelict critic
Put down for missed notes put up with misquotes
Don't want the whole story? Should have bought the Cliff Notes
Like Fingerpainting 101 give me no credit for having class
One thumb on the pulse of the nation one thumb in your girlfriend's ass
Written on written off scoff callin' me a joke
I don't think that I'm a sell-out but I do "Enjoy Coke!"
I struck gold but never took it for granite that's how I planned it so can it
Around the planet fans demand it and you'll never understand it
When I die no lie plan on mass pandemonium
They may display my brain in a pickle jar at the Smithsonian
The one part the Fuehrer the one part the Pope
It's the inevitable return baby of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
Great White Dope
Great White Dope
Great White Dope
Great White Dope
"B" is for "Balloons"
"C" is for "Crayons"
"D" is for "Drum"
Like my scrotum here it is in a nutshell
One thousand nine hundred and seventy-two
That's the year I got here when my dear mother's water blew
Not really realizing the prize that's been begot to her
The bona fide lo-fi high-octane philosopher
Genius with a penis the few the proud the me
I liked me so much I had to buy the company
Soul for sale sold to Satan for a hell of a lotta luck
I'm hard to come by like a straight guy working at Starbucks
Thank the thinkers that think they thunk the thoughts that theorized
Idolized or despised bet I'm gettin' recognized
Mount Rushmore it? No ignore it can't rock with no big head
Half of the people want me half of the people want me dead
I am the Angel of Def with my rhymes against humanity
Teeter-tottering between brilliance and insanity
The one part the Fuehrer the one part the Pope
It's the inevitable return baby of the Great White Dope
Conclusions you drew proportions you blew
Lost son of Iggy? False Bigger nose than Ziggy? True
Yes my name is Jimmy Pop no my pop's name is Dick
Don't admit to kick it slick you thick derelict critic
Put down for missed notes put up with misquotes
Don't want the whole story? Should have bought the Cliff Notes
Like Fingerpainting 101 give me no credit for having class
One thumb on the pulse of the nation one thumb in your girlfriend's ass
Written on written off scoff callin' me a joke
I don't think that I'm a sell-out but I do "Enjoy Coke!"
I struck gold but never took it for granite that's how I planned it so can it
Around the planet fans demand it and you'll never understand it
When I die no lie plan on mass pandemonium
They may display my brain in a pickle jar at the Smithsonian
The one part the Fuehrer the one part the Pope
It's the inevitable return baby of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
One part the Fuehrer one part the Pope
The inevitable return of the Great White Dope
Great White Dope
Great White Dope
Great White Dope
Great White Dope
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This song was written by jimmy pop because he was trying to make himself look really cool. Instead he makes fun of himself as he prgressed more into the song.