Innocent

"Life is Full of Little Interruptions"

Hmm... John Mayer? I think not.

But I relate to this song so well. Oh my God, this song is amazing.

'Guess you really did it this time Left yourself in your war path Lost your balance on a tight rope Lost your mind trying to get it back'

I did some things that I regret that ruined me. I felt like I jumped off a tightrope into a deep hole filled with dark blacknes... There was nothing to catch me, nothing to make me see that I wasn't falling, I was stopped, suspended in midair, blind and hurt. (See Starts With Goodbye and Lessons Learned by Carrie Underwood)

'Wasn't it easier in your lunchbox days Always a bigger bed to crawl into Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything And everybody believed in you'

I know, I'm thirteen, but I don't want to grow up. I want to go back in time and redo somethings. I want to be back in 6th grade when everything was perfect. I thought that there were so many things that I would change back then, but looking back now, I would give anything to relive that year again with the same mistakes as long as I didn't have to go on to seventh grade, where I made the worst mistake of my life. I know you people who are like 20 and 30 will say I have no idea what I'm talking about and I probably don't, but I just hate myself for doing what I did.

'It's alright, just wait and see Your string of lights is still bright to me Oh, who your are is not where you've been You're still an innocent'

I wish this was true. I wish my best friend would say this to me. Maybe then I would be able to start to forgive myself for what I did. I know I'll never fully forgive myself for doing it, but I might somewhat if I knew she did.

'Did some things you can't speak of But at night you live it all again You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now If only you had seen what you know now then'

I did somethings, as you know, that I don't tell anyone about. No one, not even my mother or my current best friend, knows how much I regret what I did, how I wish I could change it. I stay up at night and cry myself to sleep because I feel so bad now. Now I'm shattered on the floor. And trust me, if I had known what the consequences would have been, I would not done it.

'Wasn't it easier in your firefly catching days When everything out of reach someone bigger brought down to you Wasn't it beautiful running wild 'til you fell asleep Before the monsters caught up to you'

I still wish I could go back to those days when everything was fun, when I still believed in myself, when I was so blissfully happy and I didn't care about anything...

'It's okay, life is a tough crowd'

Trust me, I know. You make one HUGE mistake (or hundreds of little ones, however you want to think of it) and suddently you've ruined your whole social life.

'Time turns flames to embers You'll have new Septembers Every one of us has messed up too Minds change like the weather I hope you remember Today is never too late to be brand new.'

I made that huge mistake at the start of seventh grade, in September, so that's kind of irionic. But it's nice to be reminded that we've all messed up, that I'm not the only one going through this pain, that I can try to be better, that maybe, somehow and someway, I can start over.

'Lost your balance on a tight rope It's never too late to get it back'

I hope this is true. I'm not certain right not, but I hope it is.

BTW, it's AT NIGHT, not TONIGHT in did somethings you can't speak of but... ect.