This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
If I said what's on my mind
You'd turn and walk away
Disappearing way back in your dreams
It's so hard to be unkind
So easy just to say
That everything is just the way it seems
You look up at me
And somewhere in your mind you see
A man I'll never be
If only I could find a way
I'd feel like I'm the man you believe I am
And it's getting harder every day for me
To hide behind this dream you see
A man I'll never be
I can't get any stronger
I can't climb any higher
You'll never know just how hard I've tried
Cry a little longer
And hold a little tighter
Emotions can't be satisfied
You look up at me
And somewhere in your mind you still see
A man I'll never be
If only I could find a way
I'd feel like I'm the man you believe I am
And it's getting harder every day for me
To hide behind this dream you see
A man I'll never be
You'd turn and walk away
Disappearing way back in your dreams
It's so hard to be unkind
So easy just to say
That everything is just the way it seems
You look up at me
And somewhere in your mind you see
A man I'll never be
If only I could find a way
I'd feel like I'm the man you believe I am
And it's getting harder every day for me
To hide behind this dream you see
A man I'll never be
I can't get any stronger
I can't climb any higher
You'll never know just how hard I've tried
Cry a little longer
And hold a little tighter
Emotions can't be satisfied
You look up at me
And somewhere in your mind you still see
A man I'll never be
If only I could find a way
I'd feel like I'm the man you believe I am
And it's getting harder every day for me
To hide behind this dream you see
A man I'll never be
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