So this has been.my favorite song of OTEP's since it came out in 2004, and I always thought it was a song about a child's narrative of suffering in an abusive Christian home. But now that I am revisiting the lyrics, I am seeing something totally new.
This song could be gospel of John but from the perspective of Jesus.
Jesus was NOT having a good time up to and during the crucifixion. Everyone in the known world at the time looked to him with fear, admiration or disgust and he was constantly being asked questions. He spoke in "verses, prophesies and curses". He had made an enemy of the state, and believed the world was increasingly wicked and fallen from grace, or that he was in the "mouth of madness".
The spine of atlas is the structure that allows the titan to hold the world up. Jesus challenged the state and in doing so became a celebrated resistance figure. It also made him public enemy #1.
All of this happened simply because he was doing his thing, not because of any agenda he had or strategy.
And then he gets scourged (storm of thorns)
There are some plot holes here but I think it's an interesting interpretation.
I still recall the taste of your tears
Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears
My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore
Scraping through my head 'till I don't want to sleep anymore
You make this all go away
You make this all go away
I'm down to just one thing, and I'm starting to scare myself
You make this all go away
You make this all go away
I just want something
I just want something I can never have
You always were the one to show me how
Back then I couldn't do the things that I can do now
This thing is slowly take me apart
Grey would be the color if I had a heart
Come on and tell me, you make this all go away
You make this all go away
I'm down to just one thing, and I'm starting to scare myself
You make this all go away
You make this all go away
I just want something
I just want something I can never have
In this place it seems like such a shame
Though it all looks different now,
I know it's still the same
Everywhere I look you're all I see
Just a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be
Come on tell me you make this all go away
You make this all go away
I'm down to just one thing, and I'm starting to scare myself
You make this all go away
You make it all go away
I just want something,
I just want something I can never have
I just want something I can never have
Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears
My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore
Scraping through my head 'till I don't want to sleep anymore
You make this all go away
You make this all go away
I'm down to just one thing, and I'm starting to scare myself
You make this all go away
You make this all go away
I just want something
I just want something I can never have
You always were the one to show me how
Back then I couldn't do the things that I can do now
This thing is slowly take me apart
Grey would be the color if I had a heart
Come on and tell me, you make this all go away
You make this all go away
I'm down to just one thing, and I'm starting to scare myself
You make this all go away
You make this all go away
I just want something
I just want something I can never have
In this place it seems like such a shame
Though it all looks different now,
I know it's still the same
Everywhere I look you're all I see
Just a fading fucking reminder of who I used to be
Come on tell me you make this all go away
You make this all go away
I'm down to just one thing, and I'm starting to scare myself
You make this all go away
You make it all go away
I just want something,
I just want something I can never have
I just want something I can never have
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Yeah I´ve felt like thet so many times, but I haven´t been nobody´s girlfriend , It´s just that I wanted this person to notice me, and this was how hw made me better... when he left I was just the FADING FUCKING REMINDER OF WHO I USED TO BE when he was around.