The Hero of Rhyme

Aw yeah, it's me, Link again, baby
That's right, I'm back
Last time I quested for Zelda I got a little off-track
But now my confidence is at an all-time high
Because Navi just anointed me the Hero of Rhyme
I said the Hero of Time...
That's right, the Hero of Rhyme
I don't need no sword or shield, I'm gonna be just fine
Hey listen, I think-
Shh, I got my beats and jams
I'm taking Ganon down now, no thanks to you, Old Man (What?)
Link, thank God you're here, the countryside is terrified and shocked
We're overrun with Darknuts, Peahats, Leevers, Gels, and Octoroks
You're our Hero of the Ages with a sword and helping hand
We really need your skills
Oh, you need my skills? Aw damn
Moblins, no problems and Octoroks don't know poppycock
Gotta get that Triforce tomorrow, but first I gotta do my pop'n'lock
When I see an Iron Knuckle, Imma buckle up my pants
'Cause those bitches don't fuck around when I kick on my Z-target dance
But see, with me, I gotta find a different way to defeat
Don't use my sword and shield, but I know this flow is good enough to kill
The Hylian rejoice, 'cause your hero is the illest motherfuckin' rapper
With the illest fuckin' voice
How was that? Those raps do anything for you? (Oh God, everyone is dead)
Moving right along to Ganon's underground lair (Everything's on fire)
Don't worry, I'm not scared
I'll save all of Hyrule with the tastiest rhymes I can spit
Now watch and learn, Navi
You're a stupid piece of shit...
Wanna go, Ganon? Get your pig ass over here and try me
Just ignore the burning hellscape that's collapsing in behind me
You have never seen a rapper close to my skills whatsoever
Oh I see you brought a giant, glowing sword, that's cool, whatever
'Cause hey, I'm gonna be the last thing you see
When you lose against me here in the ruins of the city
Yeah ah, no bigger battle than here
'Cause by the time you swing your sword I'm gonna-
Oh, whoa! Chill out!
Gotta fill out, this sword was born for a partner who can
Maybe, I dunno, come out and help me out in a real bout
Hey listen, Link
Your rapping doesn't stink, but Ganon's standing right there with a giant sword-
...Ooooooh.