I’ve taught for many and many and many a year
Seen students come and go
Some kids can learn at the speed of light
And some are kind of slow

But there was no kid I couldn’t reach
No heart I couldn’t touch
Till Beavis and Butt-head came along
And had my skills for lunch

They look like they’re lead singers
In some unholy choir
They’ll shoot their BBs, trash their desks
And set your beard on fire

And through it all they’ll laugh and laugh
Like some Satanic tape
I hear it in my sleep at night
Huh huh–there’s no escape

And when I tried to reach them
And tried to understand
They took their fingers from their noses
And wiped them in my hand

And when the school year ended
When the destruction was done
They asked me to pull their fingers
And said that they’d had fun

So when I see them walking
Down my school’s once-hallowed hall
I contemplate a new career
Selling menswear in a mall.

Lyrics submitted by JohnnyLurg

The Ballad of Beavis and Butt-head song meanings
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