Do me a favor, would you please
hang up the receiver on me
before I, before I talk my vocabulary dry.
Do me a favor, would you, my Doe
Don't come over later, don't spend three days in a row
I know my pre-calculated charm will soon run low.
Cold colas to coexist
hold sodas in both her fists
I...I'd hoped for a different you.
there's comfort in the clamor of cafes
solace from the abyss of days
I...I'd hoped for a different you.
still I trace your gaze
but that's stalker praise, and I lack the turn of phrase
Every morning through Ma's twin rose trellises
grammar, middle, and Lake High
barber college, through Ma's twin rose trellises
I'd planned to pick for you a rose; my hell, this is
a plan's as close as I'll ever get; my hell, this is
I haven't yet, I haven't yet...
Do me a favor, be rational
save me the labor of the breakup call
just assume the worst
when the phone don't ring, dismiss me to the hearse

Lyrics submitted by BruisedxVioletx

The Barber's Unhappiness song meanings
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    General CommentThis song is based on the short story by George Saunders "The Barber's Unhappiness". Its about this old-ish barber who still lives with his "Ma" and often stares at younger girls and like makes up scenarios with these women ("i trace your gaze, but that's stalker's praise") in his head but never approaches them because they'll just think he's a creepy old man, hence the line "a plan's as close as i'll ever get".

    and at one point in the story, this girl in his driving class (weird, that an old man would be taking a driving class? but he was.) so when the girl catches him staring at her she actually smiles back and he thinks "what? they never smile back =D". but he doesn't approach her, he goes and sits in his car, and she goes back inside. then she comes back out with two coca colas (the line "cold colas to coexist, hold sodas in both her fists"), but he avoids her.

    I read part of it. but it was only a like 10 page preview. Does anyone know where I can find the full story online?
    ludoloveon June 16, 2009   Link

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