Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
Lately when I'm talking
I've been talking to myself
My friends say they don't notice
But they do 'cause I can tell
I wake up mad every morning
And I go to bed mad at night
My mind ain't functioning poorly
But it sure ain't feeling right
No it sure ain't feeling right
I went to see my doctor
I told him I'd been feeling blue
He shook his head and simply said
Ain't nothing he could do
Well my head aches with apprehension
Till I can't take any more pain
If I don't get some attention soon
I think I'll go insane
Yes I think I'll go insane
Paranoia
I feel you creeping through my soul, yeah
Paranoia
I feel you taking complete control, oh
Paranoia
You got me running all the time, paranoia
Paranoia
Oh what a pitiful state of mind
Don't know how long I've been this way
My mind is so confused
It seems the whole world's after me
No matter what I do
No, I can't remember
When it's ever been this bad
But lately I've felt feelings
That I never knew I had
Delusions of persecution haunt me
My one companion is fear
And there's always someone behind me
When I check my rear-view mirror
I better check my rear-view mirror
Paranoia
I feel you creeping through my soul, yeah
Paranoia
I feel you taking complete control, oh
Paranoia
You got me running all the time, paranoia
Paranoia
Oh what a pitiful state of mind
I've been talking to myself
My friends say they don't notice
But they do 'cause I can tell
I wake up mad every morning
And I go to bed mad at night
My mind ain't functioning poorly
But it sure ain't feeling right
No it sure ain't feeling right
I went to see my doctor
I told him I'd been feeling blue
He shook his head and simply said
Ain't nothing he could do
Well my head aches with apprehension
Till I can't take any more pain
If I don't get some attention soon
I think I'll go insane
Yes I think I'll go insane
Paranoia
I feel you creeping through my soul, yeah
Paranoia
I feel you taking complete control, oh
Paranoia
You got me running all the time, paranoia
Paranoia
Oh what a pitiful state of mind
Don't know how long I've been this way
My mind is so confused
It seems the whole world's after me
No matter what I do
No, I can't remember
When it's ever been this bad
But lately I've felt feelings
That I never knew I had
Delusions of persecution haunt me
My one companion is fear
And there's always someone behind me
When I check my rear-view mirror
I better check my rear-view mirror
Paranoia
I feel you creeping through my soul, yeah
Paranoia
I feel you taking complete control, oh
Paranoia
You got me running all the time, paranoia
Paranoia
Oh what a pitiful state of mind
Lyrics submitted by Tempus Fugit
Paranoia Lyrics as written by John Woloschuk
Lyrics © Peermusic Publishing
Lyrics powered by LyricFind
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In regards to the meaning of this song:
Before a live performance on the EP Five Stories Falling, Geoff states “It’s about the last time I went to visit my grandmother in Columbus, and I saw that she was dying and it was the last time I was going to see her. It is about realizing how young you are, but how quickly you can go.”
That’s the thing about Geoff and his sublime poetry, you think it’s about one thing, but really it’s about something entirely different. But the lyrics are still universal and omnipresent, ubiquitous, even. So relatable. That’s one thing I love about this band. I also love their live performances, raw energy and Geoff’s beautiful, imperfectly perfect vocals. His voice soothes my aching soul.
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So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
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Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
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Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
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This song seemingly tackles the methods of deception those who manipulate others use to get victims to follow their demands, as well as diverting attention away from important issues. They'll also use it as a means to convince people to hate or kill others by pretending acts of terrorism were committed by the enemy when the acts themselves were done by the masters of control to promote discrimination and hate. It also reinforces the idea that these manipulative forces operate in various locations, infiltrating everyday life without detection, and propagate any and everywhere.
In general, it highlights the danger of hidden agendas, manipulation, and distraction, serving as a critique of those who exploit chaos and confusion to control and gain power, depicting a cautionary tale against falling into their traps. It encourages us to question the narratives presented to us and remain vigilant against manipulation in various parts of society.
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