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I Don't Wanna Be Me Lyrics

I don't wanna be me anymore

Ever throwing at his home
Two glass houses, twenty stones
Fourteen yellow, six are blue
Could it be worse.. quite doubtful

Two steps forward, three steps back
Without warning, heart attack
He fell asleep in the snow
Never woke up, died alone

Please don't dress in black
When you're at his wake
Don't go there to mourn
But to celebrate
18 Meanings

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Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

I'd personally say that it means that he feels his life is getting crappier by the day and that he's doing nothing really to stop it. The idea of throwing stones in glass houses generally means that you're doing or saying something to harm yourself.

I'd also read at one point on Type O's homepage that Peter had an addiction to Hagen Daas at one point, it could be in response to that and his attempt to "kick the habit".

I'd say this is spot on. Good song.

Haagen Dazs? Hahahaha What else looks like snow, is addictive, and give you a heart attack?

My Interpretation
Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

Oh the cruel irony of this song. almost like Peter predicted his own end.

Peter you will be missed.

Definitely agree. Rest well, Green Man.

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

"I don't wanna be me anymore"

That should be pretty self-explanitory.

"Ever throwing at his home Two glass houses, twenty stones"

There are two sides (each represented by a glass house) to what's going on with the band when it comes to audiences. One, you have the people who like the (realitively speaking) unpopular style of music that they do, the slow, dragging, dark music that Type O Negative is most often associated with. The other, the side that is most often commericalized, put on the radio, and sold to the masses for profit, the side with the big record labels, airplay, touring and often "selling out" side of music.

Because they are always (ever) caught between the two a step towards one is a step away from the other, hence the throwing the stones at his home.

"Fourteen yellow, six are blue Could it be worse.. quite doubtful"

When you mix yellow and blue you get green, the color of the onstage attire that is attributed to them, as you can see in the music video.

"Two steps forward, three steps back Without warning, heart attack"

Every step forward in their Peter's career is also a step back because he hates publicity at times. He doesn't enjoy live shows because he's self conscious about himself when infront of people. On top of that, when he was interviewed by one of the members of Anthrax he mentioned how his music was being exploited by the recording label (Roadrunner?) to make money. He recieved pressure from the label to create more songs with a mainstream style after the commercial success of this song and album. He saw it comming.

"He fell asleep in the snow Never woke up, died alone"

He also mentioned that they don't have true fans that stick with them over time (between albums, sounds, after one hit, etc.) and they forget about the band, and once you lose a following it's hard to get them back, which is why they've lost popularity over the years.

"Please don't dress in black When you're at his wake"

He's speaking out against the stereotype of rock bands struggling to maintain popularity and then only being heard of every now and again.

"Don't go there to mourn But to celebrate"

He's saying that he's not doing it for the popularity. Hell, like his idol (and mine) Kurt Cobain of Nirvana who felt the need to isolate the band from the masses of fans, he feels that if fewer people listen to him then he's not out anything. In a sense, it's actually what he wants.

Side note:

The music video is about how the music company wants them to be something that they're not, a money making sellout. The man that walks into he house looks like he works in an office and it shows that Type O Negative being a commercially successful band for the company is just a pathetic fantasy and that it's not going to happen, which explains the last scene where the man acts as though he can't believe what's happening and he becomes trapped.

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

Well the Yellow stones are of trial and purging. The Blue is the Word and healing power of God, those colors are significant biblically. 20 sins and only six forgiven. Now I just wonder, who he is singing about???

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

I like the video of this one. It may have a different meaning than the lyrics but it's worth checking out.

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

someone expresses themselves at home in ways they cant in public

My Interpretation
Positive
Subjective
Enjoyment
Self-expression
Liberation
Privacy
Individuality
Contrast
Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

I heard this song on the Cinema mod for Max Payne 2 and it's just a great song.

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

Hey conducter, hehe yeah i heard it too on the cinema mod.. great song... but as for the meaning.. i really dont know..

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

I'd have to agree with Tarrant7575 about the meaning. I love this song, it was the one that got me into Type O Negative.

Cover art for I Don't Wanna Be Me lyrics by Type O Negative

the verses make it appear to be about someone dying. i think maybe it is about someone not wanting to be alive, and that others should celebrate his death because that's how he'd want it.

 
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