so that was an interesting experience. well jsut so u know, i dont just tell you things because i dont want you to be mad when you find out. i tell you because i WANT you to know. i dont like keeping things from you. but i tell you not to get mad or not to freak out first because i dont want to get insulted like last time. i want to warn you. but if you think i dont want to tell you youre wrong. i do. i jsut dont want to have what i tell you, be used to insult me. thats not okay with me.

idk why i let myself get close to people. they always find a way to hurt me. whether it be behind my back or to my face they find a way. im tired of hurting. of being hurt. if you're my friend, be my friend. dont talk shit about me behind my back. i thought we grew out of that middle school behavior. maybe i was wrong

im about to implode. and you just make it worse

fuck.

Scheiße ficken Scheiße ficken Scheiße ficken Scheiße ficken

i just made a huge decision. its not perminant but its big. and i know that you will disagree but this is my choice. this is his choice. no one elses. and i hope u understand that. i dont want you to be disappointed or upset because it is going to happen eventually. and he said he wud understand if i changed my mind which could happen. and im partially hoping it does. this is a big step. and think im ready. i hope im ready.

i told him last night abotu a secret i've kept from everyone for about 3 months. at first he didnt say anything and then he said "i want to help you get through this". thats it. and to be honest, no one can "get me through this". it is what it is. it will be what it will be.adn thats that

i have been replaced. thank you

im so worried. i think his bulimea is back. or he's seriously ill. no one basically pukes their guts up everyday adn is fine. he wont listen to me. i told him to go to the doctors. but he wotn listen. and im scared. and im worried. i dont want to see him hurting himself or being hurt by something else what scares me is that he says this has happened before which is why its ok. that does not make it okay. that makes it worse and more serious.

you're always out with him. you always talk about him. you say you love me, yet you hardly make ANY time for me. i get my hw done because you say you will call me. then you tell me you were out with him and youre doing your hw now. im not something you can just push aside. i am your girlfriend. i am a person. i dont expect to be pushed aside