Love your hate, your faith lost. You are now one of us. i suppose he's something of a best friend. he always tells me things the way they are. no pussying around. anyway, he told me i was an idiot. "i'm sorry, but you are!" well, he's right. he knew why, as well. "ever since you've been with us, you've turned into an idiot." that's true. i've changed since i've found them. which is good, 'cause that's all i've ever wanted to do. that's why i owe those two my life; if they hadn't saved me, i'd still be the way i was before. maybe even dead. before seems so long ago now. so yeah, it was nice to be out with just those two again. he said i was an idiot 'cause i bunked school, that's why. i don't care. it was worth it. i could get away with it again. a lot of people saw us but they did jack. and who suspects an A* student? im not even on 'first contact'. well im glad he doesn't know what im going to do. he'd say i was stupid. could even stop talking to me. i dont think i'd like to sit back and watch my best friend ruin her life either. but i can't ever sit back and watch anything, can i? have to get involved. have to save them. so what's going down? i've got a plan. it's a bit shaky round the edges, but we can get to where we've got before, we always do. and i think it'll work, if i can just get there and go through with it. oh, and it's going to destroy me. either way. if i succeed, i'll have destroyed myself, but if i fail, i destroy all this emotion. it's a simple choice - save your heart or save your body. my heart every time.

HAPPY :D Again. This time FOR GOOD. 'i'm starting to notice the difference between the lies that you spin and the truth that you mean..'

well of course i wasn't over it. You always hold your head up high, 'cause it's a long long long way down. But in the end it doesn't even matter. DOES IT EVEN MATTER TO YOU THAT I CARE. Heaven sends and heaven takes. But it's not your choice to make. i just.. i don't know.. how could you..? just another trial and an error to you isn't it. i'm shaking. :/ [Listening to: A Sadness Runs Through Him - The Hoosiers]

So i'm over everything and don't care any more and no, i'm really not jealous. though my friends seem to have taken it upon themselves to care and hate people for it, and its causing a rift in the group, i think. i'm trying really hard to hold it all together but some people are starting to sound like they're forgetting i'm on their side. or maybe i'm making too big a deal of this. i wish i was in love. i wish there was someone who mattered. i wish everyone would finally realise that they matter. now it's all over all my lyrical inspiration has gone out the window, obv. so turns out i've got no lyrics to write here after all. so i'll put someone elses =) "Always here, always on time. Close call; was it love, or was it just easy?" -The Killers "Calling tears from deep inside, oh you're so exquisite. And in the mirror, all midnight eyes. Oh, if i could remain.. But it's just a visit. All midnight eyes read 'vacancy'." -AFI They make a little more sense. (: Listening to: [Bleed Black - AFI]

Right well what the hell do you need to know. Here. v Girl. Fourteen. Likes The Killers. Got two guitars, pencil, paper, a few opinions and she. still. cares. so i write a lot of lyrics. (: And this journal is where they're all going. Aren't you lucky? You ain't even reading this. i have a journal. a little blue notebook, in my bag AT ALL TIMES. i would write lyrics in there but that's not really what it's for. i'd quite like people to read my lyrics. (YEAHH, even tho they suck, whatever, i know.) And NO ONE at all ever can read my journal. Except he did, quite possibly the worst entry he could have come across too. but that's his fault and tbh i don't really care now. (: BUT that's another story. Maybe another time. Nahh, you ain't even reading this, you wouldn't care. i like other people's lyrics too. why i joined this site maybe? carry on. (: [Listening to: Johnny Panic/The Rebel]