Sadly I was really late discovering Elliott Smith. But since I have, I cannot get enough of him!
A really good friend of mine died of a Heroin overdose a couple years ago, and this song was and is, on my favorite song list.
This song completely connected to my friends death in my mind.
Here’s why...
‘Told me how he’s been driven by a curse
Til he kicked out into reverse”
Anyone who’s ever dealt with heroin addiction knows that it’s a curse
That you live with and most likely wrestle with the rest of your life.
And those lines make me think about the in and out of using
Kicking
“Said I don’t go where I’m supposed to go
And I don’t really go anywhere at all”
....Your life is stunted when using
You stop enjoying doing the things you used to
“And I made up my mind and I don’t mind”
Giving into to getting high
“‘I went to meet you at central square
And when I couldn’t find you there
I went walking round the city some more’”
‘People watching with a cold blank stare’”
“And I saw your face in everyone I swear”
...anyone not part of your world at this point is alien.
That entire verse haunted me because my friend who died
I kept expecting to see him just cruising around town
But he was gone
‘ I was walking slow to a dirty dive’
... describes the feeling of being really loaded..
...In your own world
‘I was so sick of trying to change your mind
When it’s so easy to disconnect mind’
I’ve never known one addict who wasn’t trying to get off of dope
And usually you have a buddy
You don’t want to quit alone
So you make little pacts that tomorrow you’ll both stop
But it’s just so much easier to go get high again
‘High times
Yeah I feel fine”
‘Don’t pick me up
Cause I’m fine right where I am”
If it weren’t a great feeling
It wouldn’t be so hard to quit
‘I don’t go where I’m supposed to go’
copping dope
There’s not an addict out there that does not wrestle with their addiction
In my opinion
So I could be wrong
But the beautiful thing about music is it speaks to us all right where we are in that moment
And this was my song for losing my friend
Sadly I was really late discovering Elliott Smith. But since I have, I cannot get enough of him!
A really good friend of mine died of a Heroin overdose a couple years ago, and this song was and is, on my favorite song list. This song completely connected to my friends death in my mind. Here’s why...
‘Told me how he’s been driven by a curse Til he kicked out into reverse” Anyone who’s ever dealt with heroin addiction knows that it’s a curse That you live with and most likely wrestle with the rest of your life. And those lines make me think about the in and out of using Kicking
“Said I don’t go where I’m supposed to go And I don’t really go anywhere at all” ....Your life is stunted when using You stop enjoying doing the things you used to
“And I made up my mind and I don’t mind” Giving into to getting high
“‘I went to meet you at central square And when I couldn’t find you there I went walking round the city some more’” ‘People watching with a cold blank stare’” “And I saw your face in everyone I swear” ...anyone not part of your world at this point is alien. That entire verse haunted me because my friend who died I kept expecting to see him just cruising around town But he was gone
‘ I was walking slow to a dirty dive’ ... describes the feeling of being really loaded.. ...In your own world
‘I was so sick of trying to change your mind When it’s so easy to disconnect mind’ I’ve never known one addict who wasn’t trying to get off of dope And usually you have a buddy You don’t want to quit alone So you make little pacts that tomorrow you’ll both stop But it’s just so much easier to go get high again
‘High times Yeah I feel fine” ‘Don’t pick me up Cause I’m fine right where I am” If it weren’t a great feeling It wouldn’t be so hard to quit
‘I don’t go where I’m supposed to go’ copping dope
There’s not an addict out there that does not wrestle with their addiction In my opinion
So I could be wrong But the beautiful thing about music is it speaks to us all right where we are in that moment And this was my song for losing my friend