Martinis On The Roof Lyrics

Lyric discussion by crispingsleeve 

Cover art for Martinis On The Roof lyrics by Superchunk

I tried to transcribe this about 10 years and gave up because of the fool I would make of myself with the chorus. I always went back and forth between:

Chivas at a hundred proof or Cheetos and a hundred proof

Chivas makes sense with the 'single malt recruit' line, but it really sounds like Mac is saying Cheetos. And I don't think they make a Chivas that's 100 proof.