It's a conflict, he doesn't know weather to embrace or erase the person. Maybe a family member, I'm thinking, because they are the most difficult to cut yourself off from; they're your roots, your childhood. "It feels like I'm infected by my dad's disease", his dad's "disease" could be self-destructive behaviour like running away from problems ("I'm hiding from the battles I don't want to fight") and/or clinging to those who hurt you ("feed me pain").
It's a conflict, he doesn't know weather to embrace or erase the person. Maybe a family member, I'm thinking, because they are the most difficult to cut yourself off from; they're your roots, your childhood. "It feels like I'm infected by my dad's disease", his dad's "disease" could be self-destructive behaviour like running away from problems ("I'm hiding from the battles I don't want to fight") and/or clinging to those who hurt you ("feed me pain").