Storms

I fell in love with an addict. It's in my nature to try and repair the broken. Little did I know that I would become the broken one. He became addicted to me. For months I was his drug. He breathed me in and I was all he wanted. My friendships dwindled and soon all I had was him. Then one day without warning, he decided that I was no longer enough. He started needing drugs and bad crowds again. I tried desperately to hold on and gain back what we had, but he viewed it as me smothering him when all I was doing was trying to hold on. I thought we were worth the fight. In the end, I was just too easy to throw away. I wasn't "cool" enough because I didn't do drugs and I did not fit into his lifestyle. I never dealt with the end of our relationship. I just let go. Walked away. He let me go just like that. That was years ago and it still stings. I know he still thinks of me. He used to say that he could feel me thinking of him. I feel it too. Everytime we touched, there was a force of pulling that was so strong. We could not get close enough. We would sleep postively wrapped around each other and still need more. I still rememeber it so clearly. The attraction between our minds, bodies, and souls was electric. I think it was too much to handle at times. He couldn't handle it. We were young and not ready for it. It was truly once in a lifetime. Now, I am always a storm.