Not Falling Apart

It's about 2 friends who've ended up sleeping with each other. One develops feelings for the other, whereas the other doesn't want anything more. They continue to have a sexual relationship, and to the singer's dismay, the "friend" has not developed anything and just sees it as sex. Throughout the explanation, I've put friend in parenthesis, because this friend isn't really a friend. A friend is someone who doesn't use another, especially when such deep feelings are involved.

Please excuse the super long explanation, by the way. This may not all be accurate, I may just be projecting. But, whatever. That's what music is for, people will interpret things differently.

"Danced all night and slept all day/Careless with my heart again/Fearless when it comes to playing games"

• I don't think he's describing himself at the moment. I believe the line 'danced all night and slept all day' describes his "friend" as someone who is a free spirit. 'Careless with my heart again' is how he feels in the situation, that his friend knew there was something there, that he has feelings for them, however they didn't mind it. 'Fearless when it comes to playing game,' again describes how the "friend" is a free spirit. They're fearless, careless and don't mind playing games, making him feel like there's a chance that they can be together.

"You don't cry and you don't care"

• The "friend" doesn't show any emotion to his feelings.

"Afraid to have a love affair"

• I don't think this necessarily means that the "friend" is currently seeing someone. I believe it just means a new relationship with him. He's pursuing something, and he feels like it's love. The "friend" is the one who is afraid to purse anything, especially since the singer feels so strongly for them.

"Is that your ghost or are you really there?"

• Once again, the "friend" is emotionless. They don't care.

"Now I can't walk, I can't talk anymore/Since you walked out the door/And now I'm stuck living out that night again/I'm not falling apart"

• He can't function properly, he's lost. He wants to be with the "friend" so badly. He continues to relive that moment the "friend" walked out on him, because it's something they always do. He then tries to be sarcastic and says, 'nah, I'm not falling apart.'

"Wither on a sunny day/Time slows down; I wish you'd stayed/Pass me by in crowded, dark hallways"

• See how a rose or a plant flourishes in the sun? It's happy and getting all the rays it needs to live. Well, this is the opposite for him. Often, people are at their best on beautiful, sunny days. But, for him, although it's a sunny day, he's sulking. "Pass me by in crowded, dark hallways," he'll be sulking in the darkness on his own.

"I try my hardest not to scream/I find my heart is growing weak/So leave your reasons on the bathroom sink"

• He's trying his best to compose himself, but he's slowly losing. He's upset, and nothing can make him feel otherwise until she feels the same, so he tells her to leave her excuses as to why they can't be together on the sink - the drain. The drain is where waste/garbage goes, so to him, her excuses are garbage.

"I heard you say you needed me now/What's the problem; I can't see"

• His "friend" has come around again, now that they see he's slowly moving on. They're showing interest, saying they need them as "friend" now, because they're going through problems. But, the singer is being a bit vengeful, saying "yeah, whatever. I don't see a problem."

"You destroyed me, I won't fall apart again"

• He's finally told his friend, "you destroyed me. I was once this confident, happy-go lucky guy. However, I'm onto you. I need to fix myself. I'm not gonna let you destroy me again."

"Take what you want/And I will be just fine"

• Once again, he's telling his "friend" sarcastically, 'take whatever you want from me,' which is sex and that he'll be fine. There's a little sadistic pleasure in it, though. Because, it's the only way he'll be able to spend time with his "friend."

"You'll be better off alone at night/Waiting and falling/Constantly calling out your name/Will it ever change?"

• He's telling his "friend," that they'll be OK regardless what happens. That at night, when they leave to go back to their place, they won't feel anything, whereas he'll be destroyed. He'll long for them some more. He'll be waiting for them, still falling for them. Constantly thinking about them. He then asks, "what the fuck? Is it ever gonna change? This cycle is exhausting."