I can't speak for Emilie, but I can speak for myself.
Having been sexually and psychologically abused by a person I fell in love with, this song completely expresses the rage and frustration I felt before I even had words to describe what happened to me. It took me over 2 years to even admit what happened to myself, and it's taken 2 more years to even realize how deeply the psychological effects have scarred me and limited my emotional capacity.
And the thing is that even after confronting said person, they do not believe what happened was anything more than a "mistake". The total manipulation of one person over another (I don't consider it "giving more than I wanted to give to a dickhead", I gave my love and trust, I did not give up these parts of my psyche that he stole from me and I can't reclaim).
The truth is that emotional abuse (whether or not rape was involved) completely changes a person. The shock can leave high-capacity people without means to express what has happened, even to themselves. They downplay it, try to reason it off, until there's a time when the victims are strong enough to handle the truth. When you wake up one day and realize those "trust issues" and odd personality quirks are not just eccentric traits but symptoms of PTSD, avoidance personality disorders, etc... is a very sobering and enraging day.
I can't speak for Emilie, but I can speak for myself. Having been sexually and psychologically abused by a person I fell in love with, this song completely expresses the rage and frustration I felt before I even had words to describe what happened to me. It took me over 2 years to even admit what happened to myself, and it's taken 2 more years to even realize how deeply the psychological effects have scarred me and limited my emotional capacity. And the thing is that even after confronting said person, they do not believe what happened was anything more than a "mistake". The total manipulation of one person over another (I don't consider it "giving more than I wanted to give to a dickhead", I gave my love and trust, I did not give up these parts of my psyche that he stole from me and I can't reclaim). The truth is that emotional abuse (whether or not rape was involved) completely changes a person. The shock can leave high-capacity people without means to express what has happened, even to themselves. They downplay it, try to reason it off, until there's a time when the victims are strong enough to handle the truth. When you wake up one day and realize those "trust issues" and odd personality quirks are not just eccentric traits but symptoms of PTSD, avoidance personality disorders, etc... is a very sobering and enraging day.