Lyric discussion by DrShankums 

Cover art for No Children lyrics by Mountain Goats, The

I think there a few interpretations

The first being obvious, a couple who hate each other. The music itself may be a hint towards the lyrics also. The song sounds like a happy sing along song, but once you look deeper you see that it is sad and depressing, maybe like their marriage. They are stubborn and neither one wants to be the one to give up, supported by this lyric here:

I hope it stays dark forever I hope the worst isn't over And I hope you blink before I do And I hope I never get sober

I think it's him saying he can and will beat her. They don't love each other and stick with each other because it's comfortable, supported by this (other's have said that's the way alcoholics are. I don't drink, but that's how I am with my current relationship, it's just comfortable):

I am drowning There is no sign of land You are coming down with me Hand in unlovable hand

If he is depressed with no sign of hope, then he is going to make sure she will also be depressed.

The above doesn't make much sense though. Maybe there's a different meaning?:

I hope I lie And tell everyone you were a good wife And I hope you die I hope we both die

Why would he lie if he hates her so much?

And I hope when you think of me years down the line You can't find one good thing to say

I think what the above is saying is that he thinks this is all his fault. Maybe it's his fault there are no children. He wants her to blame him but some reason she won't. Maybe it isn't a mutual hate, maybe he hates her and she doesn't hate him. We only assume the hate is mutual, but what if she is forgiving and he isn't? What if he hates himself because he can't provide children.

And I'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out You'd stay the hell out of my way

He wants to leave the relationship because he feels guilty, but he knows he won't be able to if she stops her. That might be why he wants her to hate him.

Well, there are a couple different interpretations in there, so either one might be true. Hel, neither could be true.

My Interpretation