this is song is all an illustration of how narrator feels about his life, and about how he feels he needs to change himself but cant do anything to make a difference in his life or how he feels about it: "every day is new year's eve, every time is the last time."
He even gives samples of rules he sets for himself in the song:
"wipe out all self pity, it's slowing me down" and
"turn of feeling pretty, dressing up, dressing down"
the singer looks at his life very negatively, as he clearly implies, which makes the line "i had a birthday party and it was packed, got friends when who love me," a hollow and ironic attempt at self-assurance, while he truly feels lonely, depressed, and friendless. in the first lines "you make me feel like im ok, i could be happy" he is talking about probably a girl he knows or is dating or a really close friend or family member, and this is the one person in his life that makes him feel ok with who he is. everyone else just makes him feel alone and inadequate.
personally, i think this is the same person he is addressing in the chorus,
you said i should get professional help
it always makes me cry
i know im just an amateur but
ive gotta try
this is someone he trusts, who tells him he needs professional help, which obviously, based on the rest of the song, means psychiatric help. her/him saying this upsets him ("it always makes me cry") because he wants to think he is ok, like that person usually makes him feel, but instead that person is validating his feelings that he is not ok, which makes him feel totally hopeless and worthless because not only does he want to think he is ok, but the wants that person to think he is ok.
despite the pop song structure, this is a really depressing and emotionally deep song. i really want to see what other people think about this one.
this is song is all an illustration of how narrator feels about his life, and about how he feels he needs to change himself but cant do anything to make a difference in his life or how he feels about it: "every day is new year's eve, every time is the last time."
He even gives samples of rules he sets for himself in the song: "wipe out all self pity, it's slowing me down" and "turn of feeling pretty, dressing up, dressing down"
the singer looks at his life very negatively, as he clearly implies, which makes the line "i had a birthday party and it was packed, got friends when who love me," a hollow and ironic attempt at self-assurance, while he truly feels lonely, depressed, and friendless. in the first lines "you make me feel like im ok, i could be happy" he is talking about probably a girl he knows or is dating or a really close friend or family member, and this is the one person in his life that makes him feel ok with who he is. everyone else just makes him feel alone and inadequate.
personally, i think this is the same person he is addressing in the chorus,
you said i should get professional help it always makes me cry i know im just an amateur but ive gotta try
this is someone he trusts, who tells him he needs professional help, which obviously, based on the rest of the song, means psychiatric help. her/him saying this upsets him ("it always makes me cry") because he wants to think he is ok, like that person usually makes him feel, but instead that person is validating his feelings that he is not ok, which makes him feel totally hopeless and worthless because not only does he want to think he is ok, but the wants that person to think he is ok.
despite the pop song structure, this is a really depressing and emotionally deep song. i really want to see what other people think about this one.