This album dropped not long after my most favorite person in the whole world passed away: my grandmother. She raised me, and passed just 3 hours after my 27th birthday ended... as much as it might seem a bit of a stretch to those of you who don't know me, this song - to me- is spoken from her point of view.
Bodies disengaged, our mouths are fleshing over. <-- talking about how she's slipping away
Is this an echo game? <-- things are being said over and over, no one is listening
Irises retreating to ovals of white. <-- body shutting down (eyes lose color upon death)
The urge to feel your face, and blood rushing to paint my handprint. <-- she suffered a stroke and couldnt move her hands anymore to touch me or any of us...
A Frisbee one by one; your vinyl on lamanent, desperate for some kind of contact. <-- she couldn't speak or hear us very well..she was losing contact with all of us.
Chorus:
First train home, I've got to get on it. <-- Obviously I see this as a literary reference... first train home...getting to heaven quickly.
Temporal deadzone where clocks are barely breathing. <-- she passed at 3:45am ... the middle of the night... none of us were thinking clearly... we were dead tired, stunned, shut down. It even felt like time stood still (clocks barely breathing)
yet no one cares to notice for all the yelling on, they clamor to hold it together. <-- my family had totally resorted to complaining and yelling about the stupidest crap just to feel like that had some sort of control over the situation. We yelled and argued to hold it together.
I want to play--don't wait--forms in the hideaway
I want to get on with getting on with things
I want to run in fields, paint the kitchen, and love someone
And I can't do any of that here, can I? <-- Obviously she can't do any of that here... her body has shut down and is now holding her prisoner. She wants to leave so she can live again - just not here on Earth
First train home, I've got to get on it.
First train home, I've got to get on it.
First train home, I've got to get on it.
First Train home.
So what? You've had one too many. <-- I do admit I drink heavily and used it a lot to cope during the months she fell ill before she died.
So what? I'm not that much fun to be with. <-- no shit.
So what? You've gone silly hatter <-- Yup. Lost my mind in those months... but so what.
So what? I didn't want to come here, anyway. <-- She is very religious and I really could almost see her saying this. She didn't ask to be born. Let her stay "up there" instead of dealing with the cruel world.
What matters you, doesn't matter, matter to me. <-- I'm leaving anyway. You can't keep me here
What matters to me, doesn't matter, matter to you. <-- I need to go, even though you want to hold on to me.
What matters to you, doesn't matter, matter to them. <-- The doctors are more concerned with the nature of her condition ..they see this every day.
What matters to them, doesn't change anything. <-- What matters in terms of medicine and science won't ever change that I'm about to leave
Got to get on it.
First train home.
Got to get on it.
First train home.
First train home I've got to get on it
(I've got to get on it)
To catch, to catch, catch-catch, catch.
(First train home)
First train home I've got to get on it
First train home.
(First train home)
Got to, Got to, Got to, Got to, Get, Get, Get, Get, Out, Out, Out, Out, Now, Now, Now, Now.
...and there you have it. I love you. Rest in peace.
This album dropped not long after my most favorite person in the whole world passed away: my grandmother. She raised me, and passed just 3 hours after my 27th birthday ended... as much as it might seem a bit of a stretch to those of you who don't know me, this song - to me- is spoken from her point of view.
Bodies disengaged, our mouths are fleshing over. <-- talking about how she's slipping away Is this an echo game? <-- things are being said over and over, no one is listening Irises retreating to ovals of white. <-- body shutting down (eyes lose color upon death) The urge to feel your face, and blood rushing to paint my handprint. <-- she suffered a stroke and couldnt move her hands anymore to touch me or any of us... A Frisbee one by one; your vinyl on lamanent, desperate for some kind of contact. <-- she couldn't speak or hear us very well..she was losing contact with all of us.
Chorus: First train home, I've got to get on it. <-- Obviously I see this as a literary reference... first train home...getting to heaven quickly.
Temporal deadzone where clocks are barely breathing. <-- she passed at 3:45am ... the middle of the night... none of us were thinking clearly... we were dead tired, stunned, shut down. It even felt like time stood still (clocks barely breathing) yet no one cares to notice for all the yelling on, they clamor to hold it together. <-- my family had totally resorted to complaining and yelling about the stupidest crap just to feel like that had some sort of control over the situation. We yelled and argued to hold it together.
I want to play--don't wait--forms in the hideaway I want to get on with getting on with things I want to run in fields, paint the kitchen, and love someone And I can't do any of that here, can I? <-- Obviously she can't do any of that here... her body has shut down and is now holding her prisoner. She wants to leave so she can live again - just not here on Earth
First train home, I've got to get on it. First train home, I've got to get on it. First train home, I've got to get on it. First Train home.
So what? You've had one too many. <-- I do admit I drink heavily and used it a lot to cope during the months she fell ill before she died. So what? I'm not that much fun to be with. <-- no shit. So what? You've gone silly hatter <-- Yup. Lost my mind in those months... but so what. So what? I didn't want to come here, anyway. <-- She is very religious and I really could almost see her saying this. She didn't ask to be born. Let her stay "up there" instead of dealing with the cruel world.
What matters you, doesn't matter, matter to me. <-- I'm leaving anyway. You can't keep me here What matters to me, doesn't matter, matter to you. <-- I need to go, even though you want to hold on to me. What matters to you, doesn't matter, matter to them. <-- The doctors are more concerned with the nature of her condition ..they see this every day. What matters to them, doesn't change anything. <-- What matters in terms of medicine and science won't ever change that I'm about to leave
Got to get on it. First train home. Got to get on it. First train home.
First train home I've got to get on it (I've got to get on it) To catch, to catch, catch-catch, catch. (First train home) First train home I've got to get on it First train home. (First train home) Got to, Got to, Got to, Got to, Get, Get, Get, Get, Out, Out, Out, Out, Now, Now, Now, Now.
...and there you have it. I love you. Rest in peace.
wow, that's a very beautiful yet strange interpretation. It's funny how music does that. I'm sorry for your loss.
wow, that's a very beautiful yet strange interpretation. It's funny how music does that. I'm sorry for your loss.