Belated Promise Ring

I looooove this song. I'm addicted, I think.

I took it to be pretty open-and-close, apart from the metaphors that are probably over my head :-)

My take on it is that this song is written from a guy's perspective. He's in love with a girl named Rebecca, and though there are flaws and faults, even things that might break them up years from now, he ignores them Because he's so lovestruck, her flaws don't even register with him: "And my mother says Rebecca is as stubborn as they come They both call to me with words I never knew" From a different standpoint (his mother's perspective), Rebecca is very, very stubborn, yet he hadn't noticed on his own because of his infatuation with the girl.

He wants a boy when he has kids, but Rebecca doesn't. This issue is never resolved in the song, illustrating how nearsighted the narrator is being about this relationship. He's pretty much all set to be married, but Rebecca's still got some wild oats to sow: "I once gave to my Rebecca a belated promise ring and she sold it to the waitress on a train". He's more committed than she is, and frankly, she doesn't care and won't be rushed. And fool-in-love that he is, he'll wait patiently.

"They say, "Time may give you more than your poor bones could ever take" In response to his situation (being in love with this independent, strong-willed girl) the narrator is told that life always throws more at you than you're really built to handle. He is gentle and attentive, while Rebecca is blunt and strong-willed. I took this statement to have a positive connotation: if life is the reason he’s in love with her, it feels like “they” are saying his fate is sealed, and he is destined (or doomed) to be with her.

@ the people who say "my Rebecca" means that he's probably her father, I disagree. I think he just calls her that as an affectionate term. The best example that comes to mind is (don't judge me) from Everybody Loves Raymond. When a married guy finds out that his ex-girlfriend was being set up for a date, he said, "you can't do that." When asked why not, he answered, "because she's my Stefania". So it isn't only fathers who use that term. it's like sweetheart or something like that-generally neutral in defining a relationship. In the context of this song, I'd say that they're romantically involved, because

1. He gave her a promise ring. I've never heard of a girl getting one from her father.
2. The fact that they're sleeping in together (thanks to unkleknowpockets for pointing that out).
3. The lines, "she may kiss me when her girlfriends leave again" (Because girlfriends and boyfriends are typically the ones in competition for a girl's attention, not fathers.)
4. He could never love another girl. What is the significance of this line? No one else could take her place. Who would be her competition? Another daughter? I doubt he means to imply that, upon having another child, he won't love his second born, simply because he's so very taken with the first. And I doubt that his adoration for his daughter would stop him from falling in love with a woman. That's just creepy.
5. (Here's the kicker): "Saw the statues of our /fathers/ in the courthouse flower bed" Yeah... So, as far as I can see, this is just a young man in love with a girl named Rebecca.

Reading into their relationship, specifically its future, I don't see it lasting, or at least being happy. He won't remain blind forever, and already we can see that they don't want the same things, in this case, the gender of their child (of course, once the kid is born, that's that, am I right?). He's willing to give her promise rings, while she blatantly sells them. She'd rather have money than a token of his affection, showing that things are unbalanced between them. And the same goes for her only kissing him when no one is around. I think that's self-explanatory.

So, this is a song about a young man head-over-heels for a girl who doesn't feel as strongly for him, and has the ability to chew him up and spit him out. What a bittersweet sentiment. :-)