"I tried to carry you. And make you whole," because I'm a good and faithful Codependent.
"You say you care for me. But hide it well. How can you love someone. And not yourself?" It took me 12 years of marriage to finally realize you hid your inability to love. Your words of love for me were fraudulent! The only love you have is for your drug of choice, not for me, not even for yourself! This is my justification for why I left you! I deal with the pain and remorse for that decision every day, but have to leave the guilt to you. I'm sorry, but I have to leave some of that to you. If I could take all of the guilt on your behalf, I would, but there's no room for more. And you'll never get credit for loving me. You never did because you don't know how.
"You long to hear my voice. But I'm long gone." I know you miss me and I miss you, but that's not love baby and we deserve more.
"Who'll watch over you? Who will give you strength. When you’re not strong? Who’ll watch over you when I’ve Gone away?" Through God's grace, HE will watch over you. Don't lose faith, and continue to hope. Through these, I still and always will pray for you. I pray that you will learn to love and I give thanks that you haven't destroyed my ability to love.
To D., my ex:
Oh God! This song hurts me to the core.
"I tried to carry you. And make you whole," because I'm a good and faithful Codependent.
"You say you care for me. But hide it well. How can you love someone. And not yourself?" It took me 12 years of marriage to finally realize you hid your inability to love. Your words of love for me were fraudulent! The only love you have is for your drug of choice, not for me, not even for yourself! This is my justification for why I left you! I deal with the pain and remorse for that decision every day, but have to leave the guilt to you. I'm sorry, but I have to leave some of that to you. If I could take all of the guilt on your behalf, I would, but there's no room for more. And you'll never get credit for loving me. You never did because you don't know how.
"You long to hear my voice. But I'm long gone." I know you miss me and I miss you, but that's not love baby and we deserve more.
"Who'll watch over you? Who will give you strength. When you’re not strong? Who’ll watch over you when I’ve Gone away?" Through God's grace, HE will watch over you. Don't lose faith, and continue to hope. Through these, I still and always will pray for you. I pray that you will learn to love and I give thanks that you haven't destroyed my ability to love.
Make me proud! Let go. Let God.
S.