So many good comments here. And metalsandman - i agree with you about how the adjectives, verbs could be a little better... unless... the lyricist really does mean them to be so "different".
Allow me to throw a new idea into the ring:
I don't think the lyrics make the new relationship seem "forced" so to speak, but instead, convey her apprehensiveness to opening up to someone new. I think when she calls her new relationship "different", she is not discrediting the new guy - but realizing the differences in the old and new... and yet... "enjoying it". Maybe enjoying isn't such a bad verb - maybe she wasn't sure if she would enjoy a relationship of a different nature and is proud to say that she is.
I think that's what the song is about - the transition of letting an ex go and accepting someone else into your life. To illustrate, let me plug in my own experience here, and tell me if you can see how this song coincides.
My first love and I were the best of friends for years, very close, but we were always off and on when it came to dating. Our relationship (when in session) was fun, restless, spontaneous, innocent, energetic, loving, passionate - like you see in the movies. Running naked through a field, watching the sun come up, snowball fights, moon-lit walks and heart to hearts, sweet whispers, staring contests, telling eachother our dreams, skinny-dipping, laying in silence together, lauging til our sides split - sounds perfect, right?
Well it was to me anyway. It was "beautiful", but it was also "dysfunctional". We're talking years of being off and on dating - never because we hated eachother, but I blame commitment-phobia. Finally, I'll admit... I was the first to start wanting to settle down. "Fall in love... yadi yada yada". Not a conscious thing, but just felt myself settling (in how I thought, the choices I would make, etc). And who had i always thought of myself settling down with? You got it... except... he wasn't ready. I held on for so long, falling more and more in love, silently thinking I could sway him to want to settle down with me... but...long story short - he still wanted to be a free-spirit. The hurt was so deep that I had to break all contact with him and found out through a stranger that he moved away shortly after. That was over a year ago.
Our story was so unique and so long and so deep and so perfect in my eyes. That when it didn't have the perfect ending, I was CRUSHED.
My boyfriend now is the one who followed. When we started going out, I compared everything he did to my ex. I still wasn't over him. In some ways, I don't think I ever will be. But I am happy again and open to love again and it took time and a lot of patience on his part (like in this song). :) My boyfriend is so "different" from my ex - but I've grown to love the differences.
He is more mature, more stable, more confident in things my ex wasn't, and vice versa. He loves me and has no problem saying things like, "maybe next year we'll..." or just "we or us" in the future tense about anything! But My boyfriend now would never run naked through a field with me. But he would talk politics with me all night. My boyfriend now doesn't really like fishing. But he loves taking me and teaching me sailing. My boyfriend now won't go running with me. But he will spend $10 more a month so we can work out together at his gym. My boyfriend now wouldn't want to dance with me in the living room. But he would buy me this CD and let me listen to it while he cooks me dinner. :)
I still miss my ex sometimes (especially after writing all this) but I have grown to love someone new finally. And he loves me back !All those things I loved about my ex are now dear memories. My boyfriend is nothing like my ex, but his differences, while scary and strange to me at first, are now beautiful and dear to me as well. And he loves the cooky things about me too.
And now I can say to him "I only know that I belong where you are". :)
when i read your post, i freaked out, because my story is EXACTLY the same. like bizarrely so. and i also relate to this song, and it always reminds me of my ex inthe back of my mind. (the only difference is that my new boyfriend is my ex's best friend...well they arent really best friends anymore haha.) i seriously cant get over your post though..like its the same down to the cute things you said you guys used to go. And my new boyfriend is much more stable, but also less creative and spontaneous. Like you said, he wont...
when i read your post, i freaked out, because my story is EXACTLY the same. like bizarrely so. and i also relate to this song, and it always reminds me of my ex inthe back of my mind. (the only difference is that my new boyfriend is my ex's best friend...well they arent really best friends anymore haha.) i seriously cant get over your post though..like its the same down to the cute things you said you guys used to go. And my new boyfriend is much more stable, but also less creative and spontaneous. Like you said, he wont dance with me in the living room, but he would buy me the cd. Me and my ex would dance in the parking lot of the gas station waiting for his tank to fill up, he'd play guitar while i sang songs we wrote, we'd watch sunsets from all differnt spots, he'd give me piggyback rides when my feet hurt from my favorite heels, he made me crazy paintings, he built me a cardboard castle and gave me a tiara so i could be a princess for a day. My new boyfriend is amazing, but a little more cliche. I love him, but he is more the make me cute cds, go out to dinner, hold hands and talk all night. We go to the movies without feeling compelled to dress up like the characters and act like them all night, he knocks on the door rather than throwing rocks at my window. However, my new boyfriend also doesn;y get irrationally jealous and possessive, or make me cry because he is so unstable. But I always relate this song to me.
I completely agree with the idea that the word 'different' isn't used in a negative way. When I hear the song, it perfectly describes my situation right now.
I completely agree with the idea that the word 'different' isn't used in a negative way. When I hear the song, it perfectly describes my situation right now.
Earlier this year, my 1st boyfriend and I broke up for the 3rd and last time in 2 years. I had kept clinging to what I thought we had- as time went on, I realized that our relationship was completely unequal and toxic. I was in complete denial, but like she says 'I loved him so but I let him go/Cause I knew he'd never love me back.' He had never cared...
Earlier this year, my 1st boyfriend and I broke up for the 3rd and last time in 2 years. I had kept clinging to what I thought we had- as time went on, I realized that our relationship was completely unequal and toxic. I was in complete denial, but like she says 'I loved him so but I let him go/Cause I knew he'd never love me back.' He had never cared as deeply for me as I had for him.
A while later, I started dating my current boyfriend. He'd been after me since before my ex and I had even started dating. And he is truly 'wonderful.' He's kind, passionate, takes care of me, and is just over all... amazing.
But despite it all, I sometimes still wonder what his motives are; I've been so damaged by my ex into thinking that everything comes with a price to pay- that the happiness I feel with my boyfriend isn't just natural and he's playing me to get what he wants.
I had- and in someway still have- a lot of trouble moving on, but I know it's something that needs to happen because what I have with my boyfriend is so much better. There's none of the lies, none of the broken promises, no twisting of my heart in pain when I look at him, no fear of him, no crying myself to sleep every night. Just simple, endless love, passion, and care. That's what makes it different, and that what I love about our relationship- and about him.
Somehow, I can relate...
There was this boy.. my first love, first everything..
''He and I; had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional it couldn't last..''
It was this crazy, sick, love triangle. I'm not proud of that, I didn't meant to hurt anyone, I just loved him. I thought I was better for him, and that how it seemed to be. He loved her too, she was his first love, but they were so unhappy. They couldn't function anymore. She also hurt him a lot. Somehow, I wanted to help him heal from her and all hard things in his life.. At moments it...
Somehow, I can relate...
There was this boy.. my first love, first everything..
''He and I; had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional it couldn't last..''
It was this crazy, sick, love triangle. I'm not proud of that, I didn't meant to hurt anyone, I just loved him. I thought I was better for him, and that how it seemed to be. He loved her too, she was his first love, but they were so unhappy. They couldn't function anymore. She also hurt him a lot. Somehow, I wanted to help him heal from her and all hard things in his life.. At moments it seemed possible. He wanted to try, then he couldn't, but he still wanted me in his life. And I couldn't let it go. It was so hard, so wrong, but so beautiful at the same time. But we all get fu*ked up in that triangle. He hurt me a lot. He didn't know what he wanted, he was complicated, saying goodbye, then turning back.. It made me insane. He finally left here. He called me. He told me he needs time and space, but that he cares and wants me in his life. I really believed that we could make it. At least as friends. I really wanted him in my life. But, we couldn't. He needed time, space, he stop calling, he said I'm asking too much, maybe I did. But he keep on repeating he cares, and wants me in his life. And after a while I found out he met someone else, which hurt me even more.. He wasn't able to admit that to me by himself. He said she was different from both of us, she don't want to tie him, and I don't know... I let him go. I decided that we won't be even friends, although he wanted to, 'cause he always cared, and appreciated me. I couldn't... I don't know anymore if he really loved me, or anyone of us. But I still remember all our beautiful moments... He used to say, we met in such a wrong time and space. He wished it was in different time. Maybe we could function.. but...
I'm still alone, but there is this guy.. He is there for some time, trying, but I haven't gave him a chance.. like any other before. He is different, he is great.. but, he is not HIM. Then I ask myself, why would you even wanted someone like HIM? And I'm afraid. And I don't know.. I'm probably missing a good chance. Like HE missed that one with me.
But this song hits me so hard!
I don't know why am I talking about this here, to you.. You have your own life.. I felt this kind of need. I understand you.. and I' glad you are happy again with that new guy. That gives me hope and strenght to move on.. I hope I'll make it..
Thank you.
So many good comments here. And metalsandman - i agree with you about how the adjectives, verbs could be a little better... unless... the lyricist really does mean them to be so "different".
Allow me to throw a new idea into the ring: I don't think the lyrics make the new relationship seem "forced" so to speak, but instead, convey her apprehensiveness to opening up to someone new. I think when she calls her new relationship "different", she is not discrediting the new guy - but realizing the differences in the old and new... and yet... "enjoying it". Maybe enjoying isn't such a bad verb - maybe she wasn't sure if she would enjoy a relationship of a different nature and is proud to say that she is.
I think that's what the song is about - the transition of letting an ex go and accepting someone else into your life. To illustrate, let me plug in my own experience here, and tell me if you can see how this song coincides.
My first love and I were the best of friends for years, very close, but we were always off and on when it came to dating. Our relationship (when in session) was fun, restless, spontaneous, innocent, energetic, loving, passionate - like you see in the movies. Running naked through a field, watching the sun come up, snowball fights, moon-lit walks and heart to hearts, sweet whispers, staring contests, telling eachother our dreams, skinny-dipping, laying in silence together, lauging til our sides split - sounds perfect, right?
Well it was to me anyway. It was "beautiful", but it was also "dysfunctional". We're talking years of being off and on dating - never because we hated eachother, but I blame commitment-phobia. Finally, I'll admit... I was the first to start wanting to settle down. "Fall in love... yadi yada yada". Not a conscious thing, but just felt myself settling (in how I thought, the choices I would make, etc). And who had i always thought of myself settling down with? You got it... except... he wasn't ready. I held on for so long, falling more and more in love, silently thinking I could sway him to want to settle down with me... but...long story short - he still wanted to be a free-spirit. The hurt was so deep that I had to break all contact with him and found out through a stranger that he moved away shortly after. That was over a year ago. Our story was so unique and so long and so deep and so perfect in my eyes. That when it didn't have the perfect ending, I was CRUSHED.
My boyfriend now is the one who followed. When we started going out, I compared everything he did to my ex. I still wasn't over him. In some ways, I don't think I ever will be. But I am happy again and open to love again and it took time and a lot of patience on his part (like in this song). :) My boyfriend is so "different" from my ex - but I've grown to love the differences. He is more mature, more stable, more confident in things my ex wasn't, and vice versa. He loves me and has no problem saying things like, "maybe next year we'll..." or just "we or us" in the future tense about anything! But My boyfriend now would never run naked through a field with me. But he would talk politics with me all night. My boyfriend now doesn't really like fishing. But he loves taking me and teaching me sailing. My boyfriend now won't go running with me. But he will spend $10 more a month so we can work out together at his gym. My boyfriend now wouldn't want to dance with me in the living room. But he would buy me this CD and let me listen to it while he cooks me dinner. :)
I still miss my ex sometimes (especially after writing all this) but I have grown to love someone new finally. And he loves me back !All those things I loved about my ex are now dear memories. My boyfriend is nothing like my ex, but his differences, while scary and strange to me at first, are now beautiful and dear to me as well. And he loves the cooky things about me too.
And now I can say to him "I only know that I belong where you are". :)
when i read your post, i freaked out, because my story is EXACTLY the same. like bizarrely so. and i also relate to this song, and it always reminds me of my ex inthe back of my mind. (the only difference is that my new boyfriend is my ex's best friend...well they arent really best friends anymore haha.) i seriously cant get over your post though..like its the same down to the cute things you said you guys used to go. And my new boyfriend is much more stable, but also less creative and spontaneous. Like you said, he wont...
when i read your post, i freaked out, because my story is EXACTLY the same. like bizarrely so. and i also relate to this song, and it always reminds me of my ex inthe back of my mind. (the only difference is that my new boyfriend is my ex's best friend...well they arent really best friends anymore haha.) i seriously cant get over your post though..like its the same down to the cute things you said you guys used to go. And my new boyfriend is much more stable, but also less creative and spontaneous. Like you said, he wont dance with me in the living room, but he would buy me the cd. Me and my ex would dance in the parking lot of the gas station waiting for his tank to fill up, he'd play guitar while i sang songs we wrote, we'd watch sunsets from all differnt spots, he'd give me piggyback rides when my feet hurt from my favorite heels, he made me crazy paintings, he built me a cardboard castle and gave me a tiara so i could be a princess for a day. My new boyfriend is amazing, but a little more cliche. I love him, but he is more the make me cute cds, go out to dinner, hold hands and talk all night. We go to the movies without feeling compelled to dress up like the characters and act like them all night, he knocks on the door rather than throwing rocks at my window. However, my new boyfriend also doesn;y get irrationally jealous and possessive, or make me cry because he is so unstable. But I always relate this song to me.
I completely agree with the idea that the word 'different' isn't used in a negative way. When I hear the song, it perfectly describes my situation right now.
I completely agree with the idea that the word 'different' isn't used in a negative way. When I hear the song, it perfectly describes my situation right now.
Earlier this year, my 1st boyfriend and I broke up for the 3rd and last time in 2 years. I had kept clinging to what I thought we had- as time went on, I realized that our relationship was completely unequal and toxic. I was in complete denial, but like she says 'I loved him so but I let him go/Cause I knew he'd never love me back.' He had never cared...
Earlier this year, my 1st boyfriend and I broke up for the 3rd and last time in 2 years. I had kept clinging to what I thought we had- as time went on, I realized that our relationship was completely unequal and toxic. I was in complete denial, but like she says 'I loved him so but I let him go/Cause I knew he'd never love me back.' He had never cared as deeply for me as I had for him.
A while later, I started dating my current boyfriend. He'd been after me since before my ex and I had even started dating. And he is truly 'wonderful.' He's kind, passionate, takes care of me, and is just over all... amazing.
But despite it all, I sometimes still wonder what his motives are; I've been so damaged by my ex into thinking that everything comes with a price to pay- that the happiness I feel with my boyfriend isn't just natural and he's playing me to get what he wants.
I had- and in someway still have- a lot of trouble moving on, but I know it's something that needs to happen because what I have with my boyfriend is so much better. There's none of the lies, none of the broken promises, no twisting of my heart in pain when I look at him, no fear of him, no crying myself to sleep every night. Just simple, endless love, passion, and care. That's what makes it different, and that what I love about our relationship- and about him.
Somehow, I can relate... There was this boy.. my first love, first everything.. ''He and I; had something beautiful But so dysfunctional it couldn't last..'' It was this crazy, sick, love triangle. I'm not proud of that, I didn't meant to hurt anyone, I just loved him. I thought I was better for him, and that how it seemed to be. He loved her too, she was his first love, but they were so unhappy. They couldn't function anymore. She also hurt him a lot. Somehow, I wanted to help him heal from her and all hard things in his life.. At moments it...
Somehow, I can relate... There was this boy.. my first love, first everything.. ''He and I; had something beautiful But so dysfunctional it couldn't last..''
It was this crazy, sick, love triangle. I'm not proud of that, I didn't meant to hurt anyone, I just loved him. I thought I was better for him, and that how it seemed to be. He loved her too, she was his first love, but they were so unhappy. They couldn't function anymore. She also hurt him a lot. Somehow, I wanted to help him heal from her and all hard things in his life.. At moments it seemed possible. He wanted to try, then he couldn't, but he still wanted me in his life. And I couldn't let it go. It was so hard, so wrong, but so beautiful at the same time. But we all get fu*ked up in that triangle. He hurt me a lot. He didn't know what he wanted, he was complicated, saying goodbye, then turning back.. It made me insane. He finally left here. He called me. He told me he needs time and space, but that he cares and wants me in his life. I really believed that we could make it. At least as friends. I really wanted him in my life. But, we couldn't. He needed time, space, he stop calling, he said I'm asking too much, maybe I did. But he keep on repeating he cares, and wants me in his life. And after a while I found out he met someone else, which hurt me even more.. He wasn't able to admit that to me by himself. He said she was different from both of us, she don't want to tie him, and I don't know... I let him go. I decided that we won't be even friends, although he wanted to, 'cause he always cared, and appreciated me. I couldn't... I don't know anymore if he really loved me, or anyone of us. But I still remember all our beautiful moments... He used to say, we met in such a wrong time and space. He wished it was in different time. Maybe we could function.. but... I'm still alone, but there is this guy.. He is there for some time, trying, but I haven't gave him a chance.. like any other before. He is different, he is great.. but, he is not HIM. Then I ask myself, why would you even wanted someone like HIM? And I'm afraid. And I don't know.. I'm probably missing a good chance. Like HE missed that one with me. But this song hits me so hard! I don't know why am I talking about this here, to you.. You have your own life.. I felt this kind of need. I understand you.. and I' glad you are happy again with that new guy. That gives me hope and strenght to move on.. I hope I'll make it.. Thank you.