It's a very ambiguous song, it could have both positive and negative meanings. He could be talking about going through some sort of catharsis before he changes his life for the better, but I'm more inclined to believe the passover he's talking about is indeed death. He's reluctant about whether he should go on with it as he knows he has "duties" (a wife and a child). To kill himself would be liberating but it would also mean he'd bebacking out. To stay would only bring him more suffering, so either way he loses:
"Can I go on with this train of events?
Disturbing and purging my mind
Back out of my duties, when all's said and done
I know that I'll lose every time"
He was determined to end his life, but then the crisis came which made him doubt. It's like a discussion between the two parts of his personality, the determined one and the hesitating one. The first one asks:
"Is this the role that you wanted to live? "
And the second one replies:
"Can I go on with this train of events?"
We know which won. Even if we didn't know anything about how he died, it would be obvious from the way the song ends.
Pain, guilt and death are the wastelands he has to cross before he could finally feel free to go through the "next set of lives".
It's a very ambiguous song, it could have both positive and negative meanings. He could be talking about going through some sort of catharsis before he changes his life for the better, but I'm more inclined to believe the passover he's talking about is indeed death. He's reluctant about whether he should go on with it as he knows he has "duties" (a wife and a child). To kill himself would be liberating but it would also mean he'd bebacking out. To stay would only bring him more suffering, so either way he loses: "Can I go on with this train of events? Disturbing and purging my mind Back out of my duties, when all's said and done I know that I'll lose every time"
He was determined to end his life, but then the crisis came which made him doubt. It's like a discussion between the two parts of his personality, the determined one and the hesitating one. The first one asks: "Is this the role that you wanted to live? " And the second one replies: "Can I go on with this train of events?"
We know which won. Even if we didn't know anything about how he died, it would be obvious from the way the song ends.
Pain, guilt and death are the wastelands he has to cross before he could finally feel free to go through the "next set of lives".