misera, that's the exact impression I got when I first heard this song. Just the line "I can take 1,000 showers and never be clean" says it all to me. I think the rest of the song follows up, too. I think "I am so angry, I am so at ease, I feel like some great big disease" sounds very reminiscent of a rape. The confusion and self-loathing in the lyrics could be quite a few things, but I believe your guess is accurate.
misera, that's the exact impression I got when I first heard this song. Just the line "I can take 1,000 showers and never be clean" says it all to me. I think the rest of the song follows up, too. I think "I am so angry, I am so at ease, I feel like some great big disease" sounds very reminiscent of a rape. The confusion and self-loathing in the lyrics could be quite a few things, but I believe your guess is accurate.