Double Team Lyrics
Damn, a hard day’s rockin’. Better slip off ma shoes. Maybe give a little stretch, and a bend. Dip m’toe to jacuzzi, baby. Slip out this book: The Buttress of Windsor. Ho ho ho, who’s this? How’s it goin’?
[sung]
That’s the first thin’ I say to you.
How’s it goin’? Are you flowin’?
Listen honey,
Thinkin’ ‘bout a couple things to say to you,
Showin’, growin’,
Man I’d like to place my hand
upon your fuckin’ sexy ass and squeeze.
And squeeze!
And your underpants,
Then take a look,
‘Cause here me and KG come naked,
Out of the side-hatch,
With the oils and perfume and incense.
Now you’re groovin’,
Put on a cool ‘70s groove.
A funky groove to fuck to.
A funky groove to fuck to.
It’s all about sex supreme,
We likes to cream jeans. [sex]
Have you ever been worked on
By two guys who are hot for your snatch? [sex]
That’s what I’m offerin’ you.
You step into our room,
And then you smell the perfume,
You lay upon our roundish bed,
And then you feel a tickling on your head.
It’s KG with the feather and the French tickler,
Look out baby he got the tools.
And then you feel sumpin’ down by your feet.
It’s me, it’s JB, I’m suckin’ upon your toes.
Good luck finding a boyfriend who sucks toe, ow!
Havin’ sex with me and KG,
Now you’re talkin’ double team supreme.
Oh!
[2-part]: Ahh, oh!
Ah, that’s it, that’s right, ohmygah, oh-I-think-I’m-gonna, Ohh!
Deht! Deht! Eeee!
…Splooge!
That was the one.
JB: Hail Satan!
KG: Hail Satan!
JB: Hail Satan!

The idea of Jack and Kyle running into a room naked and double-teaming someone is hilarious no matter what. Then throw in plenty of details and a nice descriptive scene, and you've got a song capable of making even the harshest comedy critic piss his pants from prolonged laughter. I know I did.

hehehehe, so true! and its got SUCH a great tune : )

I'm pretty sure this song is about, you know, "running a train" on a D fan. Hail Satan!

one of the best D songs...my favorite part is when he says underpants

i love the begaining, the spoken part. ahahha. ho ho ho whos this?!

the best bits are the 'oonderpants!' the second 'squeeze' and the 'it's me! it's jb! i'm suckin upon your toes! hilarious

Jack Black and KG kick ass... "MAN I'D LIKE TO PLACE MY HAND UPON YOUR FUCKIN' SEXY ASS AND SQUEEEZE!"

As always, I am blown away by the subtlness of Jack Black's writing. This song is obviously about the objectification of women.

"Man I’d like to place my hand upon your fuckin’ sexy ass and squeeze."
The ultimate love statement. You don't need to say I love you or buy your girl anything. You say that and she'll immediately remember why she fell in love with you....cause you like to squeeze her sexy fucking ass.
It works for me...especially when I sing it.

I love the part after "Underpants" where it gets all evil until the groove comes in. That part is awesome!