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Before You Were Born Lyrics
how can it happen that every time
you ask us this question the answer seems like a lie
you know what we're saying and you know what it means
and it's always sincere god knows
but it never gets through to where you need
before you were born someone kicked in the door
there's no place for you here, stay back where you belong
before you were born someone kicked in the door
you are not wanted here, stay back where you belong
god damn the people who left you in pain
god damn the father without face, without name
and god damn the lovers who never showed up
and god damn the wounds that show how deep a word can cut
before you were born someone kicked in the door
there's no place for you here, stay back where you belong
before you were born someone kicked in the door
you are not wanted here, stay back where you belong
and how can it happen now that you know the cause
that nothing is changing and everything's wrong
but pain is the healing and the tears sting like alcohol
just keep on there breathing
we'll bring you down the long, long road back home
Song Info
Submitted by
rabidpenguin On Dec 08, 2001
More Toad the Wet Sprocket
Walk On The Ocean
All I Want
Windmills
Something's Always Wrong
Fly From Heaven
No comments? Wow.
I really like this song. It captures this defiant, slightly bitter feeling perfectly, without depressing the listener.
I heard somone once tell me it was written from the perspective of a gay man, dealing with the rejection that comes with his alternative lifestyle. It makes alot of sense, and it's an interesting theory.
My impression was that it just speaks to most everyone. Everyone feels at one point or another that they were given a raw deal, dealt bad cards. Everyone wants to curse it all at one point or another. The last line is very uplifting, and the melody and the strong rythm section give it a posotive, motivational feel.
great song to listen to after a bad day.
@itsALLprogramMUSIC There is no way you and I hear the same song? Gay man? NOT depressing? Great song for after a bad day? Uh, yeah, to maybe tip you over the edge off of a cliff, it's great. This song is like repeated kicks in the head to a person who does not deserve it.
@itsALLprogramMUSIC There is no way you and I hear the same song? Gay man? NOT depressing? Great song for after a bad day? Uh, yeah, to maybe tip you over the edge off of a cliff, it's great. This song is like repeated kicks in the head to a person who does not deserve it.
Musically, it's catchy and all-too memorable. But the message is that life is nothing but pain, ending only with the sweet homecoming of suicide. not uplifting at all, unless you believe in "heaven", which if more people really did, would make the world...
Musically, it's catchy and all-too memorable. But the message is that life is nothing but pain, ending only with the sweet homecoming of suicide. not uplifting at all, unless you believe in "heaven", which if more people really did, would make the world a huge morgue.
I always thought this song was written from two points of view. The verses around the chorus are from the friends of someone who's continually depressed who are trying to help while the chorus is from the viewpoint of that depressed person feeling sorry for themselves. To me, the chorus has a different sound than the rest of the song, so that further makes it seem as though it's different from the rest of the song.
Either way, the end of the song always makes me tear up a little cause it resonates well and is uplifting.
dear all the misconseptionists that think this is angry music:
In their earlier years, Toad was a very angry band that sung about injustifications and made themselves heard. (see Hold Her Down) However, the tone is really more sympathetic than angry, and if you listen to it often, you'd understand. If you haven't heard it, I urge you to follow this easy two-step process
@T_D_Phoenix What does "injustifications" mean? Do you perhaps mean "injustices"?
@T_D_Phoenix What does "injustifications" mean? Do you perhaps mean "injustices"?
Back in college (93-95) it was offered up by a friend that most of the entire FEAR album was the collective experience of Glen Phillips' girlfriend being raped, becoming pregnant and the resulting choices that ultimately destroyed the relationship. I'd like to have some confirmation of that if possible. It would explain a lot of songs...
This song has always reminded me of my best friend, whose father left her mother when she became pregnant. My friend never met her father and the fact that he left her and her mom has effected her profoundly throughout her life. I realize that this may not specifically be what the song is about, but the words seem to match the situation.
I always thought this song was about a child conceived through rape. The kicked in door, the faceless, nameless father. It seems like it would have been in a time or place that a "bastard child" would cause a huge social stigma on both the mother and child. It seems like the chorus would be the rest of the family and community who didn't understand, or even blamed the woman. The supportive verses would be the ones who saw it as the crime it is and not her fault or the child's, and tried to help them, and help the child make sense of it as he/she grew older.
@Sundaisy Being an adopted adult that was conceived by rape, I would tend to agree.
@Sundaisy Being an adopted adult that was conceived by rape, I would tend to agree.
@Sundaisy Being an adopted adult that was conceived by rape, I would tend to agree.
@Sundaisy Being an adopted adult that was conceived by rape, I would tend to agree.
Interesting to me how literal people tend to take lyrics. The verse with "God damm the wounds that show how deep a word can cut" really reinforces how this applies to everyone- not just the suggested tragedy of someone who was conceived from anything unwanted-- but how EVERYONE can feel unwanted at some point given true (physical) abuse or not.
It's about one's own demons-- are they there from the moment we are conceived, or are they manifested later on when we become real breathing human beings
I should think it obvious that at least part of the song (the part in the title and repeated over and over in the chorus) is about "before you were born", someone kicked in the door.
The idea that this is about abortion is borne (ha ha) of a far too liberal (ha ha) interpretation.
Those seeking abortion are not "kicking in" anything unless it is a state-mandated abortion, which is rare on earth.
The interpretation of the song being sung to a child born as a result of rape seems to be strongly implied if not stated explicitly. Rapists often, in fact, kick in the doors of their victims.
I hear very little sympathy in this song. I hear the damning of the rapist (faceless father) but nothing approaching loving acceptance of the child, quite the opposite.
This would seem to be a very "pro choice" song, if anything to do with abortion is intended, seeing as how the child is told "there is no place for you here", "you are not wanted here", "stay back where you belong", which in a world of self-obsessed, egotistical narcissists, is very, very true. Even the so-called "pro life" activists of this world HATE the children who are born into poverty, abuse, and neglect. Look at how they vote on issues surrounding welfare, education funding, the justice system, etc.
This song is a song intended to make people born from circumstances from rape commit suicide. For stating such hateful thoughts and not overtly making any hopeful, loving statements for the listener, the band's song writer is an inhuman monster. It's one reason I never appreciated Toad the Wet Sprocket.
God damn the song writer for making me wake up at two o'clock in the morning and wonder what the f--k that 90s song was about. Since I've read the lyrics, I now know. The writer hates people born of rape. He thinks they should die for the crime their faceless fathers committed. How cruel.
@CravenImages wow that’s strong statement and how do you feel like you know extra what it’ll about and how they feel about your certainty that it’s really about the band hating children born from rape and in poverty and that they think that people born out of rape should not be alive and or should commit suicide? That’s a really strong interpretation and not a good one. Iff you have really really ever listened to this band and the things they are singing about in general and I’m not even a huge fan or st least I have not pa...
@CravenImages wow that’s strong statement and how do you feel like you know extra what it’ll about and how they feel about your certainty that it’s really about the band hating children born from rape and in poverty and that they think that people born out of rape should not be alive and or should commit suicide? That’s a really strong interpretation and not a good one. Iff you have really really ever listened to this band and the things they are singing about in general and I’m not even a huge fan or st least I have not pa ton of their stuff but I can listen and see what I can figure out if I have any ideas about what it means because I’m all about the lyrics and the writing of music and everything else and If I don’t know I sometimes look at it up and I just can’t get your ridiculous idea and the fact that you had the balls and the certainty of what you believe as truth and not a doubt that you could write a shit comment about your OPINION AND POST ABOUT THE SINGER/ SONG WRITER IS SAYING THAT PEOPLE BORN FROM RAPE SHOULD KILL THEMSELVES!?! You probably have put that ridiculous thing in any person that reads your own opinion about the suicide and the other drivel that you spew. I’m not going to tell you that I’m certain that I can tell the exact truth of the meaning of the song but I am confident that you are so wrong and I would bet you anything that you have an issue with your attitude in general and you have a tendency to believe that you’re not wrong about anything really and I’m just guessing here that you are not the most open minded person in the world or the block you live on? You don’t need to write such strong words on your mere opinion that your words can actually do wrong for someone who read it and that maybe is going through a hard time and maybe not thinking the clearest of ways but your opinion is a trigger and can be harmful in itself as you are cussing out and calling me writer inhuman monster and cruel and whatever your brilliant and ironically judgmental and ignorant af else you said. I’m not sure if you can comprehend that what you did was being assuming and judgemental as you called someone else out for being judgmental and not being so nice and you don’t see anything about that that is a little bit of a hypocrite at the very least but I’m still thinking you might just kinds need to open up the mind just a little or just not write your own thoughts or ideas or anything at all actually ever cuz I never write reviews or opinion on jack online or elsewhere but you have just been tooo hard to ignore with the absurd and ridiculous things you say that I almost want to read more about your feelings and opinion on various issues and see if you had a bad idea to do that or if it is just a little piece of many many more wise and well thought out things that you do with your time. I said almost. I’m done ranting about how stupidly or that comment and the fact you don’t even know what it’s really really about at all by any means. Just that you read the lyrics and now you know what it means and what they believe and how they feel and that they are for sure just horrible people that are saying horrible things and suggesting they want children of rape to die or even worse they should kill themselves and omg you are just infuriating that I can’t stop. I just need to. Hopefully you don’t suck nearly as much as I am positive that you do. So happy to not know you at all my gut hurts that people are such ignored and stupid and it’s just getting worse and I feel little faith in humans and now I’m really dono as I feel like I’m getting as annoying as your words are..,, but best of luck to you and you are dumb and I’m sorry for actually calling a stranger that I can’t believe I’m reading that this is real and I have disappointed myself for lowering my standards I just couldn’t…..
Hmmm... I guess I always thought this was about abortion (seemingly on the side of pro-Life), but perhaps I am reading too much into it:
"before you were born, someone kicked in the door" -- paints a scene of someone "breaking" into the womb
"there's no place here, stay back where you belong" -- an unwanted pregnancy?
"you are not wanted here, stay back where you belong" -- further alludes to the statement above
"god damn the father, without face, without name" -- again, this may allude to an unwanted pregnancy, and the fact that the mother is single
"god damn the lovers, who never showed up" -- ditto
"and how can it happen, now that you know the cause" -- perhaps they didn't use protection, even though they knew better?
"pain is the healing and the tears sting like alcohol" -- a common procedure used in abortions is to inject alcohol into the fetus' head
Just my interpretation, which may be wrong. Also, not saying abortion is right or wrong, so don't flame.
Great song, regardless of the meaning. I miss TTWS.