Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
My parents are good people, they deserve a healthy son
The way they raised me was a natural pathway to punk
Their support, of course, was privileged, but authoritarian
It's a little complicated, but I wouldn't trade it for nothin'
Pop Pop peaced, I got the Citizen, and it doesn't quite fit my wrist
But I might still grow into it, I shoulda told him he's the realest
And a nigga got no inheritance, Oma told me she dipped into it
To pay the prison of retirement and the abuse those in homes often get
I wouldn't have found my own way if y'all raised a lesser man
Family history explains my choice and how I let the treatment stand
I'm, of course, culpable in how I let life come to pass
And I would rather pick out a switch than say why I sat on my hands
Five years gone, justified away, left me a suicidal fanatic
The next five years spent at war with each and every accrued habit
Looking through family photo albums and thought, "All because of some freakin'"
We weren't always fighting to close the gaps in our independent streaks and
I was especially closed off because of my outside social treatments
Age old omertàs chain us in iron-clad silent agreements
Then I learned some family secrets and that trust gained gave me reason to share with them
That I was seeking peace in death because I was fucking tweaking
That was back in 2017 when my anxiety was peaking
With panic attacks that were so frequent, I'd pass out when they'd start creepin'
Felt I had shit else to lose, told my whole family the truth
I was having hands put on me paired with wild mental abuse
I'm just one nigga this happened to and there's four of us in this group
The statistic is one-in-ten so the math right there for you to do
Obviously, my family was worrying about me
They watched me in my misery and troubling surroundings
But I'm grown, coulda phoned home and got over all my doubting
But I was in my head and couldn't hear those thoughts over top of the other shouting
I was keeping all my shit straight, bills paid whether or not I ate
With my style, it was no way for them to know I wasn't safe
I learned that same night
My grandma, Oma, lived that same life
That was half the surprise
My Mom was there when she became Pop Pop's wife
After that, it was a little funny
She said, "You could've saved all of your money
All that you spent on therapy
You'd still have if you just came to me"
The way they raised me was a natural pathway to punk
Their support, of course, was privileged, but authoritarian
It's a little complicated, but I wouldn't trade it for nothin'
Pop Pop peaced, I got the Citizen, and it doesn't quite fit my wrist
But I might still grow into it, I shoulda told him he's the realest
And a nigga got no inheritance, Oma told me she dipped into it
To pay the prison of retirement and the abuse those in homes often get
I wouldn't have found my own way if y'all raised a lesser man
Family history explains my choice and how I let the treatment stand
I'm, of course, culpable in how I let life come to pass
And I would rather pick out a switch than say why I sat on my hands
Five years gone, justified away, left me a suicidal fanatic
The next five years spent at war with each and every accrued habit
Looking through family photo albums and thought, "All because of some freakin'"
We weren't always fighting to close the gaps in our independent streaks and
I was especially closed off because of my outside social treatments
Age old omertàs chain us in iron-clad silent agreements
Then I learned some family secrets and that trust gained gave me reason to share with them
That I was seeking peace in death because I was fucking tweaking
That was back in 2017 when my anxiety was peaking
With panic attacks that were so frequent, I'd pass out when they'd start creepin'
Felt I had shit else to lose, told my whole family the truth
I was having hands put on me paired with wild mental abuse
I'm just one nigga this happened to and there's four of us in this group
The statistic is one-in-ten so the math right there for you to do
Obviously, my family was worrying about me
They watched me in my misery and troubling surroundings
But I'm grown, coulda phoned home and got over all my doubting
But I was in my head and couldn't hear those thoughts over top of the other shouting
I was keeping all my shit straight, bills paid whether or not I ate
With my style, it was no way for them to know I wasn't safe
I learned that same night
My grandma, Oma, lived that same life
That was half the surprise
My Mom was there when she became Pop Pop's wife
After that, it was a little funny
She said, "You could've saved all of your money
All that you spent on therapy
You'd still have if you just came to me"
Lyrics submitted by furyroad97
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