Done Trying

[Verse 1]
I wish for once you would look at me like I look at you
Like I'm a human being and being that as it may know I have feelings too
I'll never pretend to forget regardless of the way you do
Never pretend to forget about a time I know was true
I feel pain just like everyone else
I feel strained just like everyone and drained like everyone else
But while for some of y'all it's cathartic putting the ink on the page
The weight on my soul is always the same
The same wild animal, same back and forth pace
The same look in its eyes, the same freedom it faces
Day in and day out but can never embrace
It's the same part of the plan that breaks (every single time)
And every line is another memory I recollect
And every other rhyme is another reason to disconnect
From everyone and everything, give me a minute to breathe
Play the beat to relax; instead I grieve
[Chorus]
I've done this, I've done that, I've done everything you've asked
I've done everything I can to forget the past
I've done my research, I've done my time
But every I put my pen to the page it's like I rewind
Here I go again, I've done this, I've done that
I've done everything I can to make it worth the rap
I've done the bleeding, I've done the sweating, I've done the crying
But you never did anything so I'm Done Trying
[Verse 2]
I'm having trouble recognising this reflection
Doing everything I can to remember a better time & impression
A time before everybody was lying
A time when people looked to you instead of hiding
Blamed you for trying to hold on to something that made you feel alive
Feel better than ever, the best you been in a long while
I refuse to be the villain in this situation
Everybody saying they losing but see they never playing
I don't expect to have the life I did at seventeen
At twenty eight, it's just sometimes it's like it's never been
And it's never been simpler to see these people for what they represent
The past; you'd think the future is heaven-sent
But this reflection don't lie and this depression won't die
And this anxiety and rage that I live alongside, they paint a different story
I don't see the conclusion having a happy ending but at least it won't be boring
[Chorus]
I've done this, I've done that, I've done everything you've asked
I've done everything I can to forget the past
I've done my research, I've done my time
But every I put my pen to the page it's like I rewind
Here I go again, I've done this, I've done that
I've done everything I can to make it worth the rap
I've done the bleeding, I've done the sweating, I've done the crying
But you never did anything so I'm Done Trying
[Verse 3]
I'm repeatedly bleeding for people; bring your family to the steeple
See me threading my being through the eye of your needle
Shedding my skin, shredding my flesh; exposition be the genesis
Exposed heart pumps blood of solar temperatures
Revelation, the DSP ain't the person he once was
I call your bluff and raise you to jump off
I don't care about your backstory
Struggle doesn't justify being unkind to everyone who try
And I was that guy, the one attempting to create, communicate
But people acted like the only thing I did was instigate perpetrate
So now I'm here to set it straight
Accelerate my exodus and bring myself to levitate
Above the quicksand and lacerate the ties that bind
Loosen this noose, yeah, liberate this fragile mind
No more excuses; ain't got the time, we are all dying
So to hell with y'all, I'm Done Trying
[Chorus]
I've done this, I've done that, I've done everything you've asked
I've done everything I can to forget the past
I've done my research, I've done my time
But every I put my pen to the page it's like I rewind
Here I go again, I've done this, I've done that
I've done everything I can to make it worth the rap
I've done the bleeding, I've done the sweating, I've done the crying
But you never did anything so I'm Done Trying