So this has been.my favorite song of OTEP's since it came out in 2004, and I always thought it was a song about a child's narrative of suffering in an abusive Christian home. But now that I am revisiting the lyrics, I am seeing something totally new.
This song could be gospel of John but from the perspective of Jesus.
Jesus was NOT having a good time up to and during the crucifixion. Everyone in the known world at the time looked to him with fear, admiration or disgust and he was constantly being asked questions. He spoke in "verses, prophesies and curses". He had made an enemy of the state, and believed the world was increasingly wicked and fallen from grace, or that he was in the "mouth of madness".
The spine of atlas is the structure that allows the titan to hold the world up. Jesus challenged the state and in doing so became a celebrated resistance figure. It also made him public enemy #1.
All of this happened simply because he was doing his thing, not because of any agenda he had or strategy.
And then he gets scourged (storm of thorns)
There are some plot holes here but I think it's an interesting interpretation.
Verse 1: Rhona
Boy (echo: Boy) you got me (echo: You got me)
Nauseous (echo: Nauseous)
I just eat and eat
Hair (echo: Hair) so messy (echo: So messy)
In fact it's (echo: In fact it's) combed in a weave
Phone keeps (echo: phone keeps)
On ringin' (echo: On ringing)
But it's not you (echo: But it's not you)
So I don't pick it up
Friends (echo: Friends) told me (echo: Told me)
But it don't help (Echo: But it don't help)
Cause boy you got me stuck
B-Section
Why (Did you mess it up)
'Cause I (Thought we were in love)
My girls tried to tell me
But I had to learn the hard way
(Now I'm so confused)
Don't know (What am I to do)
I'm caught up in this madness
Something please take me away
I'm losing sleep, and I can't eat
Can't even think
I'm losin' my mind (Whoa)
I hate your guts, love you so much
I'm crackin' up
(I'm) losin' my mind (Mind)
Verse 2: Rhona
Never would have thought that (echo: Thought... thought that)
We would be here (echo: be here)
Promises to me
Said that (Echo: said that) you were different
And I bought it (echo: Bought it)
Should of kept the receipt
Oh why...
B-Section
Why (Did you mess it up)
'Cause I (Thought we were in love)
My girls tried to tell me
But I had to learn the hard way
(Now I'm so confused) Don't know (What am I to do)
I'm caught up in this madness
Something please take me away
I'm losing sleep, and I can't eat
Can't even think (Naw, naw)
I'm losin' my mind (Losin' my mind)
I hate your guts, love you so much
I'm crackin' up
(I'm) losin' my mind (I'm losin' my mind)
This ain't me
Can't eat can't sleep
Consuming me
I am losin' my mind
Lump in my throat
On this I choke
This ain't no joke
I'm losin' my mind
B-Section
Oh, Why (Did you mess it up)
'Cause I (Thought we were in love)
My girls tried to tell me
But I had to learn the hard way
(Now I'm so confused)
Don't know (What am I to do)
I'm caught up in this madness
Can something please take me away
I'm losing sleep (Oh, no, no) and I can't eat
Can't even think
I'm losin' my mind (whoa)
I hate your guts, love you so much (Oh, no, no)
I'm crackin' up
(I'm) losin' my mind
(Now, now, now my mama said you're crazy) I'm losin' sleep
(My girls had to tell me) And I can't eat
(My girls had to tell me) Can't even think
(You don't deserve me... whoa) I'm losin' my mind
(Got me going crazy) I hate your guts
(What am I to do) Love you so much
(I'm lost without you boy... whoa) I'm losin' my mind
I'm losing sleep, and I can't eat
Can't even thinkI'm losin' my mind
I hate your guts, love you so much
I'm crackin' up
Losin' my mind
Boy (echo: Boy) you got me (echo: You got me)
Nauseous (echo: Nauseous)
I just eat and eat
Hair (echo: Hair) so messy (echo: So messy)
In fact it's (echo: In fact it's) combed in a weave
Phone keeps (echo: phone keeps)
On ringin' (echo: On ringing)
But it's not you (echo: But it's not you)
So I don't pick it up
Friends (echo: Friends) told me (echo: Told me)
But it don't help (Echo: But it don't help)
Cause boy you got me stuck
B-Section
Why (Did you mess it up)
'Cause I (Thought we were in love)
My girls tried to tell me
But I had to learn the hard way
(Now I'm so confused)
Don't know (What am I to do)
I'm caught up in this madness
Something please take me away
I'm losing sleep, and I can't eat
Can't even think
I'm losin' my mind (Whoa)
I hate your guts, love you so much
I'm crackin' up
(I'm) losin' my mind (Mind)
Verse 2: Rhona
Never would have thought that (echo: Thought... thought that)
We would be here (echo: be here)
Promises to me
Said that (Echo: said that) you were different
And I bought it (echo: Bought it)
Should of kept the receipt
Oh why...
B-Section
Why (Did you mess it up)
'Cause I (Thought we were in love)
My girls tried to tell me
But I had to learn the hard way
(Now I'm so confused) Don't know (What am I to do)
I'm caught up in this madness
Something please take me away
I'm losing sleep, and I can't eat
Can't even think (Naw, naw)
I'm losin' my mind (Losin' my mind)
I hate your guts, love you so much
I'm crackin' up
(I'm) losin' my mind (I'm losin' my mind)
This ain't me
Can't eat can't sleep
Consuming me
I am losin' my mind
Lump in my throat
On this I choke
This ain't no joke
I'm losin' my mind
B-Section
Oh, Why (Did you mess it up)
'Cause I (Thought we were in love)
My girls tried to tell me
But I had to learn the hard way
(Now I'm so confused)
Don't know (What am I to do)
I'm caught up in this madness
Can something please take me away
I'm losing sleep (Oh, no, no) and I can't eat
Can't even think
I'm losin' my mind (whoa)
I hate your guts, love you so much (Oh, no, no)
I'm crackin' up
(I'm) losin' my mind
(Now, now, now my mama said you're crazy) I'm losin' sleep
(My girls had to tell me) And I can't eat
(My girls had to tell me) Can't even think
(You don't deserve me... whoa) I'm losin' my mind
(Got me going crazy) I hate your guts
(What am I to do) Love you so much
(I'm lost without you boy... whoa) I'm losin' my mind
I'm losing sleep, and I can't eat
Can't even thinkI'm losin' my mind
I hate your guts, love you so much
I'm crackin' up
Losin' my mind
Lyrics submitted by Mellow_Harsher
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