Madness In Me

This song resonates with me because it reminds me of life with dissociative identity disorder.

"Just one spark is all it takes / I tried so hard but all goes up in flames" I can't always choose when I switch or what triggers me.

"This is not the way that I thought / I would turn out to be" When I pictured myself as an adult, I distinctly pictured someone taller, more academically accomplished, and not hampered by a serious disorder.

"Tried to get but all that I got / Was more insanity / Broken everything that I touched / Just gone against me" Trying to work with the alters and accomplish some healing, but often making things worse.

"I can’t get away" That speaks for itself. Alters are never truly free from each other.

"From the fire that burns inside, consuming" Unexplained feelings of anger.

"I fight to stand up but I can’t breathe" Panic attacks.

"The voices scream, the enemy takes over everything / This is the madness in me" My alters aren't my enemies, but the feeling of chaos and loss of control are still there.

"Just one chance is all it takes / Can’t change the past but I can fight to change today" I honestly don't know what caused my condition, but I do my best to make it bearable for everyone.

I used to listen to this song all the time when the album first came out.

I sufered from major panic attacks back then. And this song really helped me understand what was going on inside me and knowing that I wasnt really the only person who went through this.