Phantasmagoria

"I've always had trouble trusting people and it has fucked up every relationship I have ever had, weather it be with a women or a man or god. This song and the lyrics came to me as it was being written. The music and lyrics came together which is rare and it wasn't until after I had recorded the song that I realized what I had said." - Anthony Green

http://www.rocksound.tv/features/article/circa-survive

When I found out about the Lord, I wanted more, but I never could believe. That there was something that had so much love for us that could to sit and let us bleed today.

Then she showed me all her love and I couldn't trust; my gaurd was already up. Cause the foundation of beliefs that have shaped my youth, I found out they weren't true - at all.

God, money, and women will turn you mad; always reaching for something that you can't have. God, money, and women will bring you down; always searching for something that's never found.

Doesn't have to be something I can see. Oh, I don't know what to believe. Doesn't have to be something I can feel. Oh, I don't know what is real.

You got to say our lives. You got to say our lives. You got to say our lives. You got to say our lives.

God, money, and women will turn you mad; always reaching out for something that you can't have. God, money, and women will break your heart - crush your soul and leave you empty and torn apart.

phan·tas·ma·go·ri·a   [fan-taz-muh-gawr-ee-uh, -gohr-] noun

1. a shifting series of phantasms, illusions, or deceptive appearances, as in a dream or as created by the imagination.

i know that song titles don't always have to necessarily relate to the meaning of a song but since this song is pretty straight forward i believe the title ties in as it's saying that god is just a figment of people's imagination and that we as people have to figure out a way to live and take care of ourselves because there isn't some higher being looking out for us that's going to save us from everything he was raised up to believe in god but after so much heart ache and a look at the world around us he figured no benevolent god could just sit there and watch his creations suffer without intervening if he truly existed

i personally am a christian who is very sound in my beliefs but i feel a weird relation to this song, i'm sure we've all been there before lyrically and musically this is definitely one of my favorites on violent waves such a solid album

I love this song.

The first part describes a theme that has appeared in previous albums - how the character loved his belief in God, but how he can't rationalize a God which both loves us and let's there be pain in the world.

It also nods at the motif in On Letting Go where there is betrayal through the disillusionment of what he was taught growing up (in the second verse not being able to trust a girl because he was betrayed by his most fundamental beliefs).

There is a feeling of despair in that no matter how much effort you put forth you can never find God. I feel there is still a sliver of hope with the character, though, in the lines:

Doesn't have to be something I can see. Oh, I don't know what to believe. Doesn't have to be something I can feel. Oh, I don't know what is real.

It sounds like the character would be grateful for any sort of spiritual connection. But in the end it returns to the thought that having that hope that will leave you empty in the end.

Just a minor correction:

Doesn't have to be something I can see, Oh, I don't know what to believe. Doesn't have to be something I can feel, Oh, I don't know what is real.

REEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHL REEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHL WHOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH OH!

...and so forth.