Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
You're always dying inside
That much closer to home
A crowded street corner
Surrounded by people, all alone.
Pain in the heart
Ran in the dark
The wind is glum and bitter
She walks around the corner
Its like she brought the sun with her
Then everything just brightened up
I couldn't make this up
My fingers in my eyes as she walked by
Like I was waking up
In so many words
I couldn't string a sentence together to bother her
I instantly forgot all my plans and started to follow her
Its like the sky opened and God handed you directly to me
I know it sounds crazy but so is life, I'm sinking
Feeling like your heart is beating solely for me
Your legs are long and toned
You must be walking home
I love the way your lips move
When you're talking on your phone
Intoxicating and truly viewing impurities
Plague every thought of you
While I'm trailing you like your security
Lost, we couldn't know our paths would cross
But time knew it
Feet sticking out the window of opportunity
Climbing through it
Pain for sale
Looking to find a new taker
Chance to speak blown
When you looked at me
I looked in the newspaper
Because the sky opened and God handed you directly to me
I know it sounds crazy but so is life, I'm sinking
Feeling like your heart is beating solely for me
I'm miles out of my way
Creepy, I want more
I would've turned back
But you stuck your key in your front door
I'm standing across the street
The stars have aligned us to meet
Standing outside with your trash
Feeling incomplete
My finger aching for your doorbell
Like a random blob
Instead I lurked outside in the cold
Like an abandoned dog
Perish the thought:
You should cherish the words that I got in my mouth
The only words that can truly explain how I got in your house
Because the sky opened and God handed you directly to me
I know it sounds crazy but so is life, I'm sinking
Feeling like your heart is beating solely for me
Unlikely, impossible, I couldn't dream and think it
There's something happening between us, you can't deceive
I'm so in over my head I've learned to breathe in it
Your eyes are screaming and they're saying "No, baby" to me
If there was a way out I think you would've taken it
My hands and arms are the only way that you can leave
Face to face for the first time you feel what I'm feeling
Selfishly no longer breathing
Because
Of me
That much closer to home
A crowded street corner
Surrounded by people, all alone.
Pain in the heart
Ran in the dark
The wind is glum and bitter
She walks around the corner
Its like she brought the sun with her
Then everything just brightened up
I couldn't make this up
My fingers in my eyes as she walked by
Like I was waking up
In so many words
I couldn't string a sentence together to bother her
I instantly forgot all my plans and started to follow her
Its like the sky opened and God handed you directly to me
I know it sounds crazy but so is life, I'm sinking
Feeling like your heart is beating solely for me
Your legs are long and toned
You must be walking home
I love the way your lips move
When you're talking on your phone
Intoxicating and truly viewing impurities
Plague every thought of you
While I'm trailing you like your security
Lost, we couldn't know our paths would cross
But time knew it
Feet sticking out the window of opportunity
Climbing through it
Pain for sale
Looking to find a new taker
Chance to speak blown
When you looked at me
I looked in the newspaper
Because the sky opened and God handed you directly to me
I know it sounds crazy but so is life, I'm sinking
Feeling like your heart is beating solely for me
I'm miles out of my way
Creepy, I want more
I would've turned back
But you stuck your key in your front door
I'm standing across the street
The stars have aligned us to meet
Standing outside with your trash
Feeling incomplete
My finger aching for your doorbell
Like a random blob
Instead I lurked outside in the cold
Like an abandoned dog
Perish the thought:
You should cherish the words that I got in my mouth
The only words that can truly explain how I got in your house
Because the sky opened and God handed you directly to me
I know it sounds crazy but so is life, I'm sinking
Feeling like your heart is beating solely for me
Unlikely, impossible, I couldn't dream and think it
There's something happening between us, you can't deceive
I'm so in over my head I've learned to breathe in it
Your eyes are screaming and they're saying "No, baby" to me
If there was a way out I think you would've taken it
My hands and arms are the only way that you can leave
Face to face for the first time you feel what I'm feeling
Selfishly no longer breathing
Because
Of me
Lyrics submitted by Whittingham
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There is still an amazing amount of hope and will in the lyrics; and the lyrics themselve rank and easy five. If only music was stronger it would be one of those great radio songs that you hear once a week 20 years after it was released. The imagery is almost tear-jerking ("City lights lay out before us", "Speeds so fast felt like I was drunk"), and the idea of starting from nothing and just driving and working and denigrating yourself for a chance at being just above poverty, then losing in the end is just painful and inspiring at the same time.
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Great version of a great song,
It's definitely about a guy stalking a girl and killing her – there's really no doubt about it. The narrative offers evidence of a delusion: "the sky opened and God handed you directly to me." It might be worth noting that the first four lines (you're always dying inside... surrounded by people, all alone) are probably directed at the girl he's stalking. He thinks she is miserable and secretly yearns for him to rescue her, even if she isn't directly aware of it; this is also a component of his delusion.
I don't understand the line, "My finger aching for your doorbell like a random blog." What the fuck does that mean? Do fingers typically ache for random blogs?