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Creation Science 101 Lyrics
God made the world in seven days
Well, that’s one week to be specific
Now, that’s what I call scientific
Say Hallelujah, sing His praise
Four thousand forty-two B.C.
On Monday, August twenty-seven
He made the earth and sky and Heaven
Then he punched out at five-oh-three
Then he made Adam, and then Eve
A garden for them to inhabit
The apple right where Eve could grab it
And I've got proof, 'cause I believe
Creation Science 101
In the beginning it begun
And you are just beginning to educate yourself when you shun
Evolution
Then Cain and Abel he begat
And they begat all of the rest to us
Which means they must have been incestuous
I'm going to have to pray about that
There might be sinners in this class
Who might believe in Charles Darwin
I guess that's just their loss and our win
Because I'm gonna flunk their ass
If you make Genesis your text
You’ll laugh at Darwin and what he sees
To be the origin of species
Because he's just plain oversexed
Creation Science 101
You ain't no monkey's great grandson
You’ve got a research paper due
'bout the fifty reason to shun
Evolution
Don't let em' hand you that old jive
About survival of the fittest
That notion don't pass the bull**** test
'Cause look at me, I'm still alive
God made the world just like it is
He made the fossils just to tease us
Old bones to test our faith in Jesus
Yeah, this'll all be on the quiz
Creation Science 101
Now Armagedd-your homework-done
Because when this semester's through,
It's straight A's for students who shun Evolution
The kids get such an education
When they shun
The heretical theory of the development of life on earth over millions of years by means of spontaneous genetic mutation
Well, that’s one week to be specific
Now, that’s what I call scientific
Say Hallelujah, sing His praise
On Monday, August twenty-seven
He made the earth and sky and Heaven
Then he punched out at five-oh-three
A garden for them to inhabit
The apple right where Eve could grab it
And I've got proof, 'cause I believe
In the beginning it begun
And you are just beginning to educate yourself when you shun
Evolution
And they begat all of the rest to us
Which means they must have been incestuous
I'm going to have to pray about that
Who might believe in Charles Darwin
I guess that's just their loss and our win
Because I'm gonna flunk their ass
You’ll laugh at Darwin and what he sees
To be the origin of species
Because he's just plain oversexed
You ain't no monkey's great grandson
You’ve got a research paper due
'bout the fifty reason to shun
Evolution
About survival of the fittest
That notion don't pass the bull**** test
'Cause look at me, I'm still alive
He made the fossils just to tease us
Old bones to test our faith in Jesus
Yeah, this'll all be on the quiz
Now Armagedd-your homework-done
Because when this semester's through,
It's straight A's for students who shun Evolution
When they shun
The heretical theory of the development of life on earth over millions of years by means of spontaneous genetic mutation
Song Info
Submitted by
opinionhead On Jun 07, 2008
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What? No comments? Doesn't anybody else like Roy Zimmerman? Personally I think the guy is a genius, not only is he hilarious, his lyrics are also always spot on.
This song is especially cool since it's not only funny but actually a rockin' little melody to boot.
Of course, the meaning of this song isn't hard to fathom. It's a pretty straight forward, if humorous, account of the sort of horrors that will be visited upon school children in the US if creation "scientists" ever get their way and introduce creationism to science classes.
"God made the world just like it is He made the fossils just to tease us Old bones to test our faith in Jesus Yeah, this'll all be on the quiz"
Thor have mercy upon you if anything even remotely like that is ever part of the science syllabus in US schools. You'll raise a generation of scientifically illiterate incompetents, a whole generation of them!
Houston, TX - 2045 A.D... US scientists today announce plans to build a completely new class of space vehicle, powered entirely by faith in Jesus. When questioned about whether or not the $200 billion project will ever fly, scientists replied... "Of course it will! We've had engineers praying for it to work for years, we're not fools you know. Trust us, we're creation scientists.
HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM!
TV
Good news everyone; I too am a Roy Zimmerman fan. You are not alone.
Good news everyone; I too am a Roy Zimmerman fan. You are not alone.
YAY!
YAY!