1
It's been ten years of investment
It's been one foot in and one out
It's been four days of full of shit
And I feel snuffed out
It's been thirty-three years of restraining
Of trying to control this tumult
How I did invest in such fantasy
But my nervous system has worn out
I feel done, I feel raked over coals
And all that remains is the case
That it's a bitch to grow up
I've repeated this dance ad-nauseum
There's still something to learn that I've not
I'm told to see this as divine perfection
But my bones don't feel this perfection
I feel done, I feel raked over coals
And all that remains is the case
That it's a bitch to grow up
I've spent my life hovering above bottom
Thinking I can't survive what's below
But I've known through the kicking and screaming
That there was no other direction to go
I feel done, I feel raked over coals
And all that remains is the case
That it's a bitch to grow up
It's been one foot in and one out
It's been four days of full of shit
And I feel snuffed out
It's been thirty-three years of restraining
Of trying to control this tumult
How I did invest in such fantasy
But my nervous system has worn out
I feel done, I feel raked over coals
And all that remains is the case
That it's a bitch to grow up
I've repeated this dance ad-nauseum
There's still something to learn that I've not
I'm told to see this as divine perfection
But my bones don't feel this perfection
I feel done, I feel raked over coals
And all that remains is the case
That it's a bitch to grow up
I've spent my life hovering above bottom
Thinking I can't survive what's below
But I've known through the kicking and screaming
That there was no other direction to go
I feel done, I feel raked over coals
And all that remains is the case
That it's a bitch to grow up
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Odd to me that this is here, but "Tapes" and "Moratorium" are not, even though one gets a message that they =are= if one tries to post those lyrics. In whatever event, the theme of "IABTGU" is similar.
Al has been consciously struggling (at least lyrically) with her relentless perfectionism since she was 12 or so. In that, she's like a lot of performing artists. The dif -- and the payoff for all of us -- of course, is that she presents her neuroses in public, many of us see ourselves in the mirror, and we all love her for holding the mirror up.
There are parts of Al's mind that do not see growing up as anything other than a process we all have to go through with a shrug. But there are other parts that she loves to shine the light of her hugely educated self-awareness upon.
I don't think she could write the sort of stuff she does -- and then record it for millions to hear (and speculate about) -- if they she was all that sensitive or shame-saturated. She has told us a number of times (lyrically and in interviews) that she sees herself as a clueless nerd at times, then makes it pretty evident that she's anything but... and owns that, as well.